Hindsight

Come Over Let's Putter - A Hindsight Moment

2011-06-26T08:30:00.000-07:00

This picture is from 2005 when I was younger, smarter and my body was sturdier. Now that I have a "REAL" job I have a flabby bottom from sitting at a computer all day. Back then I could swing a kid or two up on my hip, wipe a nose, make a sandwich, change a diaper, do the laundry, and have dinner ready to go at five o'clock. I was a lactating super-machine, milk on the move (it has been a while since I have blogged and getting that narcissistic talk about myself out there feels really good, but enough is enough).

That there is our precious Grammy, she looks great and just the same today as yesterday. I think she may just live forever. I gave her a call the other day. "Hey, whatcha you doing?" I asked. She gave me the usual lovely oration about what her day of sitting in her assisted living suite would look like. She would stare out the window, predict the wind pattern based on the way the flag in the court yard blew, pass out in her chair only to be woken up by a med tech for her diabetic injection and then sashay her way down the hall for lunch. My listening ear on the other end of the phone caused something inside me to happen and it came from way down deep, up to my throat, it was not gurgling or bothersome but whimsical and sweet, WORDS, they were kind words right there in my mouth and out my lips..."It is Saturday, and I am just going to be puttering around the house, do you want to come hang out with me?" Her response was like machine gun rapid fire, HOW SOON CAN YOU GET HERE!

Hurray! Salvation was coming to save Grammy from the retirement home, it was me, coming to save her day and make her happy. A glorious idea filled my head and it was then that I was determined that I would make her the best dinner ever. A dinner that she truly deserved, the same dependable Sunday dinner that she used to make for us when we were growing up: roast beef, real mashed potatoes with butter resting on top, beautiful brown gravy to flow over those fluffy mounds, cottage cheese and peaches, salad and dinner rolls and a sugar free fruit pie with ice cream for dessert.The best down home southern comfort food my Grandma has seen in some time!

Our Saturday puttering was great and the dinner was turning out spectacularly. The table was set so pretty and like an innocent lamb kicking up her heels on the way to the slaughter, I gleefully whipped up those potatoes and tossed that salad not even knowing that my dinner may just be the end of Grammy, that she might meet her Maker right there at my dinner table...

stay tuned from my next Hindsight Moment - Why Retirement Homes Don't Serve Roast Beef.

Then came Psalm 26

2011-06-18T07:21:00.000-07:00

Sometimes on this blog I have shared my Christian faith and most of the time I have not. My posts are mainly just the stories and hindsight aha moments that I have after something in life has happened. Yesterday morning I woke up with my mind and heart in the thick of things and stuck. Stuck with not knowing what was going to happen to Cade and knowing that the morning would begin with me going to a real job and having to maneuver all the medical happenings over the phone.

The four people who occupy my office space seldom say much but they do hear all of my conversations with the four doctors' offices, two hospitals, and of course the two insurance companies I deal with. They probably know more than they ever wanted to know about uveitis and psoriasis and yet they are there in the same space living and doing the work we do. God is there too listening and working, working out the things that I can't forecast and see down the road and honestly even the things I can't see in the present. That is what I mean by being stuck. Stuck in the circumstance that the situation sucks, wanting to trust God but being disappointed at each turn in the road...

...and there it is in Psalm 26, maybe I noticed it because the word walk was used. I have been walking a lot lately. I can no longer drive because of the herniated disc in my back and the aching sciatica down my leg. Sitting hurts so I stand at my desk with my computer monitors stacked on paper boxes and when I have a meeting at another building on my company's campus I walk. A quarter mile or so I walk along worn out roads, beneath canopies of sycamore trees and in the solitude of it all I noticed for the first time in a long while that I am really in God's house. He is there with me all the time, when things are going well and when they are not. The reality is that I occupy God's space all the time. It really is less about me and more about Him and in my cry, right along with the writer of Psalm 25 and the countless others that turn there when they are in need I discover that I am made new. Made new to notice that I am in God's house, in His presence and He is God and I am not.

A Soul Lifted Up - Psalm 25

2011-06-15T06:19:00.000-07:00

About thirteen years ago God made me a momma and something happened to my heart. It melted for a sweet little cone head shaped boy born a few weeks early but definitely a fighter. On that day my heart changed and I got a Momma's Heart. One that loves, wipes up messes, uses lots of words for all those teaching moments, and goes to bat for my baby.

Yesterday, was one of the worst days yet in dealing with insurance and getting medicine for Cade. There are so many details about our medical system that would shock those who hardly have to use it and would just confirm and cause the heads of those who are sick or know someone who is sick to nod up and down.

This morning I am camped out in Psalm 25 hurt and seeking guidance, healing, and forgiveness for how I feel about the people on the other end of the phone that I talk to. My prayer is that I can trust God to take care of the details, that the blurriness and redness in Cade's eyes doesn't lead to blindness, that I can begin to understand why the drugs that are sitting at the pharmacy one mile away can't be given to my child because my insurance says they have to come from their specialty pharmacy in California and why that wasn't mentioned last Friday when he should have had the medicine. The words in Psalm 25 say what I need today...that my soul really needs God's help.

In My Mother's Closet: and then she turned 95 - getting ready

2011-06-12T05:10:00.000-07:00

So I have been up to something... some other blog things...I really don't recommend doing two blogs at once...it almost seems like I am having an affair on my first blog and honestly my heart belongs to Hindsight. The second blog is really self explanatory and is a gift to my extended family and a way to honor my mom. It is also a way to help my eldest sister, Selina, clean out her garage that is crammed full of all the family history.

I have decided that there are way to many responsibilities with being the first born in a family and that being the baby, the last born really does rule. My sisters would all agree that I can be a little bossy, okay maybe a lot bossy (they even gave me a small tiara once, maybe to suggest that I thought I was the queen of England or something). Recently, the months of March through May brought a whole lot of coordinating (and taking charge) to celebrate my Grandma turning 95. Most who follow this blog know how much I love my Grammy and 95 is something to celebrate. Truly, I think she was just as shocked as the rest of us that she has made it this far. The post about her party is linked below and will help transition into my next few posts.

In My Mother's Closet: and then she turned 95 - getting ready: "A lot of coordinating went into celebrating Lou's 95th birthday party and our beautiful Baker and Galloway family pulled it off to make her..."

Cleaning Up the Back Log

2011-06-10T06:04:00.000-07:00

It has been a while since I have opened up this blog and let my fingers do the talking. There has been so much going on that I now have a back log of pictures (this picture has nothing to do with the post, I just liked it) and hindsight moments to share. My last post I think was in January, when we took our visit to Seattle for Cade's appointment where he received another disease diagnosis of psoriasis in conjunction with the Uveitis. Our (mine and craig's) parent hearts hurt for our son as we see this disease ravage his body from head to toe. Today is a new day, we try a new drug that may help treat (i am root-root-rooting for a cure) both diseases. In either case our trust is fully in God, who has faithfully carried us through the fun and crazy moments and the hard times.

I would also like to say that it was with God's help that I did not rip the phone out of the wall on numerous occasions while talking to our insurance provider to help pay for Cade's treatment but honestly in my heart and sometimes with my mouth I was hating the people on the other end of the telephone line thus my predicament was asking for God to help me not be a hater and in the end everything financially has been provided for. On a side-note I am still working on the hating and bitterness part.

In the next few weeks I will have back surgery. My sedentary, lack of exercise, cupcake, cheese and wine loving life style has not served me well this past year and in March a slippery disc in my lower back decided to have an up close and personal relationship with one of my nerves, thus I have a new word that blurts out of my mouth in agony, SCIATICA. I'll have some time on my hands after surgery to write, which is both therapy and something I love.

Through Rose-Colored Glasses

2011-02-20T07:21:00.000-08:00

We were back at Seattle Children's Hospital in January, not for the usual check-up but because in December Cade's hands and feet began peeling. We have known for a while that Cade's disease is not a bump in the road anymore but rather a chronic illness that will most likely stay with him into adulthood. This last visit we made the most of the trip and saw life through rose-colored glasses, enjoyed the beauty of the Seattle/Tacoma art and history scene and had fun together as a family.
One stop on our journey - The Museum of Glass.

Jlyn reaching for the glass ceiling at Dale Chihuly's Glass Bridge.

Watching artists create amazing pieces of glass art in the Hot Shop was very cool.

This is what my kids liked the most. Pieces designed by kids and created by glass artists. If you are in the Tacoma/Seattle area stop in and see the glass museum.

In the Sandwich - the long lost post

2011-02-13T07:31:00.000-08:00

*I wrote this post back in November and it has been sitting in my draft folder. Looking back on it and rereading I decided I still like what I wrote so here it goes. Since November I turned 40 and life is still a little crazy as Craig and I try to balance work and home but we are lovingly walking through it all.

I was on a hot blog streak...then nothing. No, it was not writer's block. We are just in the sandwich. What is the sandwich? My mother-in-law described the sandwich to me a few years ago as a time in a person's life, let's say around the years of 40, when you are still caring for your children and your parents' lives change. Instead of needing your parent's help, your parents need you. Lois was speaking from experience, she had been in the sandwich and being a realist she recognized a few years back that Craig and I were entering this wedged place in our lives.

I am fighting the sandwich simply because I am not yet 40 and I so much want to consider myself sitting on the crust. I tend to think that Craig has slipped in between the bread and joined the ranks of all my siblings based purely on age but seriously one does not just slip into the sandwich. Life happens and you find yourself there.

Looking back at my own parent's lives and when they were in this phase of life makes me shudder because it was during this time that a majority of the marriages in our family fell apart. Mid-life crisis was a fresh new word rolling off my parent's lips as they shook their heads in disbelief. I was a child,there in the midst of it all, silently listening in on all this middle of life buffoonish behavior. The crazy talk that my uncle would bring to the dinner table, along with his 1970's satin brown shirt with its interesting city scene print that he chose to leave unbuttoned down to the middle of his chest only to be accentuated with a shiny gold chain, caused the eyebrows of me and my sisters to shift up to our hair lines. I enjoyed his time with us at the dinner table because just down the hall was a full length mirror that distracted my dear old uncle as he tried to talk to our family and admire himself at the same time. Vanity, pure vanity I tell you. He was at our house because he was scared of my aunt. Rightly so, she had shredded his precious water-bed which then flooded the house, Perhaps it was when he came home one night to see the moon shining through a new hole in the side of the house courtesy of Aunt Bobby's double barrel shotgun that he realized how angry she really was, maybe even scorned.

All of the happenings in my uncle's life and our family's role in being there for him was too much for me. It was too much for me to hold in and so each day I would give the daily brief of gossip fodder to my second grade class. My small town teacher was enthralled and I was happy to please. It was at the parent-teacher conference that my mother learned that the rumors flying around our small town about my Aunt and Uncle were coming from the mouth of her babe. That was the year I earned the nick-name Mouthy Martha from my mousy-brown haired mother. Needless to say, I am trying to be aware of all the discussions that go on about others...

Along Came Molly

2011-02-08T04:45:00.000-08:00

As promised with moving into a house the kiddos finally got their dog.

We adopted Molly from an animal shelter about 70 miles away. We knew she was ours for about two weeks before we could make the trek to pick her up. During the two week wait the kids would happily gaze at her picture on Pet Finder and wonder about the personality of their dog. Then it came, that magical day and after many years of waiting they are now the proud owners of a tiny ball of fur.

Jlyn surprised me the other day when she was calling for Molly. "Come here Molly Pending, Molly Pending, come here." When I asked Jlyn why she was calling the dog Molly Pending she said that was her name on Pet Finder, which of course made me laugh because Molly's adoption was pending based on us coming and picking her up. If only I could have that simple acceptance of a child again.
She has an excellent sniffer and I almost think she is part fox.

Such a snow dog and now our dog.

Let's Go to the Hop

2011-02-05T07:58:00.000-08:00

Oh my good golly gosh, Blogger still works and it is February! I am beginning to really love Saturday, not so much the big pile of laundry that has grown bigger and bigger all week and now speaks with its reek, "Please wash me today" but the reality that we are not rushing out the door.

This week the creative juices were flowing and the sewing machine made its appearance. Bah, my poor neglected sewing machine that has been designated to the top shelf of the closet is now dusty and broken down. The bobbin spinner is discombobulated and no longer wants to spin and the presser foot refuses to stand. I pushed my sweet baby machine to the limits, broke several sewing needles, was a holy terror by the time it was through and in one night the girls were ready for the 50's Sock Hop night at school.
Many thanks goes out to Hobby Lobby for moving into our town and making this skirt project very easy. My girls are growing up.

Natalie actually let me put her hair in a pony and with her penny loafers she looked crazy good swinging the hula hoop.

The hairspray was in full force on Jlyn's flipdo-hairdo. I felt like a wall flower at the party, just hanging around watching my girls have fun and then it happened, the song "Grease Lightning" came on and my youngest broke out into a full rocking replica of John Travolta's hand shaking, hip moving, dancing from the movie, Grease. Then it came, the cursed pause that mother's make. The deep breath in, held there for a few seconds and then out, the eye brows raising just a bit and the mental note in my heart saying, "I think I am gonna have to keep my extra eyes on this one." I love these lovely little pink ladies.

Shore Up

2010-11-01T05:57:00.000-07:00

This has to be one of my favorite pictures from Hawaii, simply vibrant. In the midst of last weeks busyness there has been a lot going on with the health of our extended family. Helpless is a word that comes to mind when the waters of life seem just that what they are...fluid.

I love my family, each one is an amazing gift and so it is that they are like these beautiful boats come in to be shored up, strengthened and supported.

The Password - Knox

2010-10-29T05:25:00.000-07:00

Last night was simply delightful. Natalie's notable person from history was none other than... drum roll please, if you haven't already guessed it, that sneaky green eggs and ham type of a guy, ta da...Theodore Seuss Geisel.

Nat was absolutely perfect, just saying the password Knox began an in character discourse of the life of Dr. Suess. The entire 5th grade came alive with amazing people from history. One word describes it all, CLEVER. One wish, two wish, red wish, blue wish, I wish there were pictures but Nat asked that we not bring the camera, which was pure torture for me to not capture all the cuteness.

So in honor of Theodore Suess Geisel's tenure as editor of the Dartmouth Jack-O-Lantern today's post will include pics of three very such things.

The Night of Notables

2010-10-28T05:40:00.000-07:00

Tonight is the night! The entire 5th grade at Natalie's school is hosting a night that honors notable people in history. The way Nat has been describing how things are going to work this evening reminds me of the movie "Night at the Museum." The kids dressed in costume to look like their notable will be situated through out the school's hallways, looking like statues and then suddenly come to life.

Nat has worked diligently on researching her person, writing a monologue to speak as people walk past, creating the costume and collecting props that distinguish this person from others. Here are three clues about Natalie's Notable.

I was born in Springfield, Massachusetts
I am a writer and cartoonist
My books are loved by children the world over yet they know me by a different name.

I'll do a picture reveal tomorrow of Natalie dressed like her notable. I am excited to see what it looks like when a museum comes to life kid style. Hollywood's version is pretty cool too.

Holding Out

2010-10-27T05:03:00.000-07:00

I am holding out hope that a particular food chain will make its way to this part of the country. I fell in love with Panera Bread in New Jersey and kept the fling going in Oregon. It is true that long distance love affairs do not work. I have since moved on to smaller mom and pop soup kitchens in this town but still I yearn for the fancy salads, warm delicious soups, crunchy breads and toasted bagels of my one time one and only. The tempter has come to Costco and the moment my eyes locked onto the Panera Broccoli Cheddar Soup I swept it up into the air and lightly placed it in my cart.

So good! This soup was so good. Please, please Panera Bread won't you please move closer.

Killer Pumpkin Killers

2010-10-26T05:51:00.000-07:00

I found an amazing organic farm share here. Some might say, "WHAT!" It still blows me away that here in my dusty home town there should be such a thing but there is and the owners of this place are the most wonderful and hospitable people. They send quaint e-mails of what is coming in my organic box and oh...yes... they blog about all the things I could make with the some of the weird veggies they send my way. Things like kohlrabi and the dreaded Swiss chard.

When an e-mail said, "Bring a truck to pick up pumpkins." They were serious. Last night we gutted our killer pumpkins and tonight they will become real jack o lanterns.

Whoooooo....whooooo...what a frightful scary night!

Clatter

2010-10-25T05:45:00.000-07:00

1–verb

- verb (used without object)

1. to make a loud, rattling sound, as that produced by hard objects striking rapidly one against the other: The shutters clattered in the wind.

It is probably a good thing that I don't have a picture of the wind that was blowing last night, it was down right frighting. At one point I cried out to Craig, "Is she gonna hold!" To which he stumbled out of bed, gazed out the window, mumbled a few words and then crawled back into bed.

Unbeknownst to us there are some loose boards on the second story of our new house. Combine those loose boards with the strong winds that sometimes blow here and you have one crazy night filled with me riding the waves of sleep, awake, half-asleep, half-awake and with each pull back into dreamland I had crazy thoughts of antiquated words and phrases all night long.

So I woke this morning to dark circles under my eyes that hang down to my cheeks and still chewing on the words "batten down the hatches" and a particular verse from "T'was the Night Before Christmas.". Drinking my coffee and being all thankful for Google and on-line dictionaries I decided to make "Clatter" the official Monday word of the day.

Eye Spy Something Shiny

2010-10-24T07:40:00.000-07:00

We spotted this festive piece of art on one of our trips to Seattle Children's Hospital. So far these are the things that I really like about Seattle, besides this bike.

trophy cupcakes...pike place market...the crumpet shop...the seattle aquarium...olympic sculpture park...beecher's cheese...seattle antiques market

If you go to the Emerald City check them out. Mostly food, but all that walking up and down this hilly city leaves a person mighty hungry.

Nudges

2010-10-23T07:03:00.000-07:00

They have been small, almost unnoticeable. A look back at a forward looking photo from our trip to Hawaii. An e-mail from a friend enjoying my old posts all over again. A chance meeting in the hospital gift shop with a book author, still in her pink Ladies Auxiliary over coat. All of them nudges, little pushes in the direction of this blog I call Hindsight.

I like blogging, to me it is a form of creative journaling with a twist of risk. Narcissistic? Most likely but I still like writing. This past year has been interesting. There were so many things that I wanted to write about, yet in the midst of those happenings it was probably best that I did not write. I had too many off-the-cuff callous thoughts that given a little bit of time have turned soft. Employment, having a job, has bent me over its knee and spanked the heck out of me. My time management has been turned upside down and looking back I am thankful, thankful for my lack of time to blog and that I did not open my big blog mouth to vent and then regret.

So here's to nudges and writing, I'll keep you posted.

Splashing Around

2010-09-06T08:49:00.000-07:00

One highlight from summer that deserves its own post was our one-day trip to Silverwood, an amusement and water park all rolled into one. Silverwood is situated in northern Idaho which is about a three hour drive for us. So over the river and through the woods we went, nine kids and three adults. A cousins trip it was. All the girls in one car with Craig at the wheel for a pre-tween dance party. In the other car was me and my sister, Des, driving three almost teenage boys.

When the car lurched to a stop the kids exploded out of the car and struck a pose indicating they were ready for anything.

Driving with the three boys I noticed something, boys at this age stink. They stink like vegetable beef soup. Boys make up for their smell in the fact that they sure can laugh, full blown belly laughs...

that cause others to open their mouths real wide a laugh until it hurts.

The cause of so much fun...

A crazy wild river ride.

Splashing around was fun but...

The underwater camera stole the show. Here they are the fishkateers.

Taylor
Jadyn
Cade
Maya

Summer's End

2010-09-05T07:50:00.000-07:00

Before I could blink an eye it was over. Oh! Sweet summer time where have you gone?

Our summer was quite a bit like this sand animation film...recreated day by day. My hopes are high that some reading this blog will watch the entire film, like myself. However, unless you love classical music by the most original, influential red haired Italian composer who clothed himself in red robes and funky sand art by Ferenc Cako, I totally understand that this could be torturous. Therefore, I do not expect any one of you to sit through the entire ten minutes.

Psst... just play the video and scroll down to view the pictures from our summer.

Right from the get go, Jlyn turned eight. No longer in a booster seat. Her life is great.

Nat is one of those thoughtful kids. She liked summer camp, did not like acting classes and really would like to make the home cell phone, her own, much to the angst of her brother.

Life is good for Cade. He almost seemed like a bachelor, spending one night at our house and then the next at Nate's. Having his cousin next door is kind of a nice thing I think, if only he would come home more often.

Jlyn missed having me and Craig around during the day. It was her first time having mom and dad at work during the summer and a BABYSITTER!

No worries we still had fun. Swimming. Summer Camps. Family Camping.

Trips to Portland and Seattle.

A great Seattle sidewalk artist turning Natalie into a cartoon.

And of course Baseball.
A huge highlight for Craig and Cade...Jason Repko! One of the kids Craig had a chance to coach at HHS now in the big leagues.

Fireworks and Friends

2010-07-05T08:29:00.000-07:00

It has been a while since we watched fireworks here.

A first 4th of July in America for our friends.

The river was cold.

The sunset spectacular.

Glow sticks were entertaining.

A beautiful freeing night.

Reunited

2010-07-03T09:27:00.001-07:00

It is a dangerous thing to admit and even brag that you are a blogger and then take a whole month off of blogging. I am not using the word dangerous flippantly but over the course of the last month it has crossed my mind that maybe it is time to hang up my blogging hat simply because I am not finding the time to write. But there is one teeny weeny problem, I like taking pictures and weaving narration with them too much to throw in the towel just yet. Deep down I know I am a story teller and most of the time I have a hindsight story that is just perched on the tip of my tongue ready to fly out of my mouth.

Last month the stories gushed out. They were twenty year old stories of when I played volleyball at Walla Walla Community College. It was a reunion weekend spent reminiscing and catching up as part of our team was reunited through nothing less than, drum roll please, Facebook. We found each other and then we found...COACH, living far away in Alaska but still within the reaches of social networking.

Plans were made for a weekend get away and we had an amazing time learning about each others lives through pictures, and listening to the stories of what happened after college, proposals and marriage, pregnancies with all the details of labor and delivery, motherhood and careers. We ate great food, laughed, watched old game footage of the good ol' days, and rode beautiful red cruiser bikes around the lake.

We learned all the things about our Coach and her life while she was coaching us. I had no idea that in my first year she had just lost her mom and that she was coaching our team on auto-pilot. I am blaming it all on my over permed late eighties hairdo and my self-centered teenage years. Realistically, it is not often that a Coach will come back to a team that she coaches simply because in the life of a coach each team is one out of many. There was something very cool about the way we picked up where we left off. We are a good team.

The weekend would not have been complete without some sort of black and gold WWCC Warrior attire. Thanks Coach for the t-shirts. The pics in this post are not mine, many thanks to Tonya, my red rider, bell ringing, traveling companion, for taking all the fabulous pictures. That's her right there in the front of the picture.

Dressed Up and No Place to Go

2010-06-07T05:16:00.000-07:00

In the midst of unpacking boxes the kids rediscovered the dress-up clothes. I have always been a huge fan of dress up and free play but something is a little off in these pictures. Maybe it is the age of my kids or it could be the clothes from my sister's 40th birthday party that found their way into the box. Either way it was hilariously scary.

I am thinking this would be a good band photo. A younger looking version of the B-52.

What! My baby girl. I noticed she had toilet paper hanging out of her dress. Where did she learn to stuff her bra?
Oh my! Cousin Nate liked this little black number a little too much. A nice picture for blackmail ammo later in life.
The new kid on the block.
Cade really does want to be a rock star. Really he does.

"I Love My Mommy," said....

2010-05-09T06:17:00.000-07:00

This story was not only mine but the kids favorite story during their first year of pre-school. I showed the girls this audio/video version of Owl Babies last night. Jlyn stood next to me with her left arm around my shoulder and softly kissed the side of my head maybe fifty times. Those three year old's memory flooding her almost eight year old mind and heart that her mommy would and did come back and pick her up from pre-school.

Many times after I heard this story I was troubled by the thought of what if something happens to me and I do not make it back. Oh! My sick mind at work. This was certainly the thought of the older owl babies when their mother had not returned. Yet, all the while we have the littlest owl, Bill, just wanting his mommy and in the end he finally vocalizes that it is because of love.

Time has slowly faded my own little squawk of wanting my mommy and settling in its place is the firmness of love that so inspired all that wanting in the first place. So in honor of all those who mother and are mothered have a happy love filled day.

No. 94 and She Still Takes the Cake

2010-05-02T20:31:00.000-07:00

She is still ranking No. 1 in my heart. My Grammie turned 94 on May Day and being such the sweetie that she is her only birthday request was for a coconut cream cake. I remembered her request as I did a lazy oh-what-will-I-do-with-this-free-day kind of stretch in my bed early Saturday morning. That stretching led to some remembering which led to a big Charley Horse type cramp in my gut and heart because Saturday is just a few days to late to order the beloved cake from the local bakery. As it turns out it happens to be the one and only bakery in town that makes and bakes one of the best killer coconut cakes around.

A quick Google search led to a few blogs, which led to a few cooking sites that all ended up at the same recipe, South Carolina Coconut Cake. All of this searching led to me thinking I could actually bake this cake. I did it, eventually. I guess I did not fully process all the ingredients and time involved when I read the recipe initially. In the end my cake was heavy, literally it weighed about five pounds. Including the cake, filling and frosting there is a total of ten sticks of butter, eleven cups of sugar, around eleven cups of coconut and almost five cups of heavy whipping cream.

I actually enjoyed making this cake until I got to the filling. The mixing of the butter and whipping cream generated a smell that caused me to have nursing flashbacks. I am not talking about the occupation nursing it is the breastfeeding type nursing I am talking about. When I started mixing the filling on Sunday morning, yes the recipe takes two days, the greasy crystallized gelatinous yellow mixture slapping around in my Kitchenaid triggered a thought in my head. A bad thought. My coconut "Cream" cake is really Cow Colostrum Coconut Cake and then I felt like throwing up. Leaning on the wisdom of one of the greats, Miss Mary Poppins, that "just a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down" I found out that the three cups of sugar in my yellow mixture combined with ten minutes of whipping will cause everything to turn a lovely white.

There you have it, white and lovely and enjoyed by my Grandma on her 94th birthday and another hindsight moment for me. Note to self - remember to order the cake next time.

Monotonous

2010-04-28T05:52:00.000-07:00

While my blog was sleeping, Cade turned twelve. My maternal instincts are telling me that the age of twelve for my boy is being viewed through a lens of monotony. The repetitious things in our life seem so humdrum. If I am real honest with myself I must admit that I also go through this same cycle which is more often then every twelve years more like every six months.

The upside of this stage of life is that the gift of dialogue has not been lost between my tween and me, yet. On Sunday morning, I noticed that Cade remained silent all through the singing at church. At one point I asked, "What's wrong, you don't like to sing?" His reply, "Singing in church makes my legs itch."

Laughter is a beautiful thing. Cade made me laugh and he brings joy to the journey. We keep moving, obediently in the direction of God and sometimes when it become monotonous there is the gift of a crazy singing itch to help us know that we are still alive.

A Hindsight Moment - Working Can Hinder Blogging

2010-04-19T11:28:00.000-07:00

...anyone still out there? So I took the leap and jumped back into the career thing, working full time outside of the home, that was about two months ago. WHAT!!!! Seriously, two months ago! My time management is getting better. I am no longer in my pjammies at 7:00 p.m and falling asleep with my mouth wide open while sitting in a chair. I am getting used to thinking analytically again but my brain hurts. I am learning NOT to encourage my colleagues at work with my soft, close to my face, hand-clap and hurray-we-can-do-it comments which work well on my kids but not for professional adults. It is going to take some time...this work thing... and sometimes I take a deep breath and wait for it all to balance out.

Our first week was a little rocky. On day two I had an out of body experience and went with my soul on a river of guilt to parental purgatory when I forgot to pickup Cade from school. It is a feeling I wish on no one. Seeing multiple phone calls from my boy on my cell phone, which I had left in my office, and a soft voice-mail message asking, "Where are you?" I should mention something here about my children's voices on the telephone, they have and always will be amazingly soft to my motherly ears. Sometimes heart crushing soft.

My penance, which really wasn't a punishment at all, I would consider it more like a peace offering, was a date night with Cade to none other than the local Red Robin. Why a peace offering? Look at that face. No mother in her right mind likes that piercing look. Even Jlyn has to close her eyes to avoid the stare.

On to other news. The house is finished and we moved in.

A new big canvas for a sidewalk chalk artist...and more pics and stories about the house next time...i have to get ready for work.

All in One Week

2010-02-21T08:31:00.000-08:00

One whole week has gone by and thinking about it makes me weak. Facials, pedicures and plain old fashioned pampering is what goes on with the rest of the gals in the house while I am away. This particular night last week I was yet again at the Roller Arena for the girl's school sponsored skate night. The place has not changed in the last thirty plus years and it still smells like sweaty feet with a mingling of popcorn and greasy pizza. Jlyn had a blast while I watched from my shag carpet covered seating. Next time I'll bring the camera.

SheetROCK was hung.

Mr. T models his new funeral fashions. Such is the life of a hospice chaplain. I was waiting with bated breath for the Pastor Dan Parker - " I'm a sexy man of God, and I know it." quote from the movie Raising Helen to fall from his lips but it didn't. Too chick-flickish, I guess, so I just thought it in my head.

While we were at Seattle Children's Hospital for Cade's four month check the inside of the house was texturized and painted. We got to come in and paint the girl's rooms a custom color before the trim goes on. Natalie picked out a cool wintergreen color.

Peaceful and serene.

Blue skies and a green grass theme is what Jlyn has going on in her room.

Sierra thought it looked like Easter in there but I think it is carefree and captures the essence of my free spirited youngest yahoo.

Hit the Dusty Road

2010-02-12T08:41:00.000-08:00

My brother-in-law has declared that once I am gone, moved into my own house down the street the dessert fest will come to an end. Yes, it was I who set us on this sugar course when I brought home a jumbo box of Twinkies from Costco but how did I know we would all be living together for eight months. Once the Twinkies made their appearance would it not be wrong to fail to represent the rest of the Hostess family? Ding Dongs and Ho Hos have come and gone and might I add a simple observance - is it just me or are Ho Hos really just Ding Dongs reformatted in tube form. I am sensing that I may have blogged about Hostess before and if so many of you know how I have lamented the disappearance of the Suzy-Q.

Oh! Suzy-Q, Suzy-Q, where for art thou, Suzy-Q?

Yet, there is something much more dangerous to the adults in our family than Hostess. It is just behind the pantry door. Open the door a crack and a crescendo of angelic Glorias might be heard and a light will shine out from the darkness of the pantry. That light is.....

the Original Malted Milk.

I am afraid that malt is edible goodness that is slipping into the pages of history. When I saw it on the store shelf memories came flooding back into my mind and then malt along with hot fudge and ice cream somehow floated into my cart. That night I would make a dessert that would blast in from the past and maybe just maybe I would redeem myself in the eyes of my brother-in-law.

The sight of the hot fudge jar, as he opened the refrigerator door, brought an instant suspicion and he raised a cry of "What is this?" I only had two words to say - Dusty Road. He knew what I was talking about. Farrells! The old fashioned ice cream parlour that once was the cornerstone restaurant our local mall. The very place he would take my sister to on high school dates and the Dusty Road was their love bird special. I know this because I was the twelve-year old punk sister that they sometimes let tag along.

Vanilla ice cream scoops, covered by rich hot fudge and a sprinkling of dry malted milk, surrounded by billowy puffs of whipped cream, crowned with a cherry and there you have it the Dusty Road. Alas, the ice-cream and hot fudge have vanished otherwise I would have taken a picture. My hope is that dessert forgiveness might flow down to me like hot fudge from my brother-in-law but I get the feeling he is counting down the days when I pack up my things and hit the dusty road.

Many warm wishes to everyone this Valentine's Day weekend! If you need a sweet treat for your special someone get crazy and buy the malt and try the Dusty Road. It tastes good on Carmel too.

Capturing History

2010-02-10T06:12:00.000-08:00

Our family history was very important to my mom and so begins the arduous task of capturing all of our family photos in a digital format. Which means I am taking a digital photo of each and every picture. The hope is to have a historical record of pictures and family members identified in each photo. Then we (Me and my sisters, tap...tap...! Is this microphone on? Do you hear me girls?) can begin distributing the original photos to the rightful owners.

So far it has been fun and I have yet to cry out MOTHER!!!!

A group of World War I soldiers. What do you call that, a platoon? My grandmother's uncle is one of the soldiers. The photo is in real bad shape but my digital photo turned out pretty good. Below is what the picture really looks like.

This is not KFC's Colonel Sanders. It is my Great-Great-Great Grandfather. Put him in a white suite and some glasses and he would be mighty close and you might just hear finger lickin' good come out of your computer.

These two right here win the cutest couple award. The sweet little lady is my Grandma's Aunt Esther. The man in the hat was Ester's second husband. Not sure what happened to the first. I guess I better ask. As we sat with my Grandma looking over all the pictures she smiled real big when she saw this picture and said, "She always called him Mr. Duncan and never by his first name."
Sure enough that is exactly what it said on the back of the picture. My grandma's long term memory is still razor sharp. Oh! So cute! I love old pictures.

Art Stalker

2010-02-09T06:39:00.001-08:00

Last week I was in the UPS store faxing my signed employment offer letter to my new employer (i am really going through with this work thing) and rudely listened in on another customer's conversation.

It was this guy in the video. He was wearing a knitted green stocking cap and navy blue wool coat that reminds me of being on Nassau Street in Princeton during the winter months. He asked the sales girl for a box that would fit two long wooden slats and a rolled canvas. He was shipping a few paintings and would be doing it often and he even asked about insurance for the paintings. Their worth was close to a thousand dollars.

My ears were afire. Was I not standing in the UPS store in my small lonely southeastern Washington State town and right next to me was a real live artist? What else could I do but ask if he was the artist and he kindly pulled out his i-touch and showed me his work and ta-da, it is Cory the Painter. If you can, watch the video to the end. See if you can still see the three nudes in the painting.

My encounter was like a little gift, a small ray of hope that there is an art community here and from talking with Cory there are more young artists lurking among the sage brush. "Are you an artist?" he asked. With a big smile and a quick shake of my head I told him that I was not and that I would classify myself as more of an art stalker.

Stuffed and Wrapped

2010-02-05T15:37:00.000-08:00

The house got a new coat this week. I kind of like the shades of brown but this is just the base color and not the final. Our house plan is one that our builder builds a lot so for us to see what it looks like in our neighborhood of diverse houses makes me happy. It looks unique and cute. That's right Mr. T...cute!

My last blog post about the house included the heart of the house. This here is the nervous system and I shant forget about the soul of the dwelling either. THE SURROUND SOUND. I made Mr. T sell the soul of our last house as part of our move to Princeton. We all had to make sacrifices. Mine was the loads of rubber stamps and bins upon bins of crafting stuff. He was sad...so sad and that made me feel bad so I promised that when we owned a home again he could put a whole lot of soul into it and he is.

Finally they are putting the stuffing in and next week the sheet rock will be going up. If everything goes as planned we will get the keys on April 2nd.

Pick Me! Me! Me!

2010-02-04T18:34:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago I donned my purple tights, black suit, and a fine pair of mid-high heels and did that panel job interview thing. It has been ten years since I have squeezed my body into business attire and entered a professional work zone. I'll be the first to admit that the tights were a little risky. Sadly my Degree - Little Black Dress deodorant was no match for my nerves and as I sweated it out there were moments in the interview as I talked about my skizzles that I felt like Donkey from the movie Shrek bounding up and down calling out "Pick me! Pick me! Me! Me!" So they did. They picked me!

Now I am going to have to go through with the whole thing. I start working full time in a few weeks. Life will be crazy. I am not sure how it will all work out but it will. There maybe many Hindsite moments for our family along the way and I am saying a little prayer right now just hoping I will be able to find the time to blog about it.

Twenty-somethings

2010-02-01T08:41:00.000-08:00

The twenty-somethings are on my mind. Not little thoughts here and there but mass thoughts that crowd up my head and leave little space for anything else. Most of my encounters with twenty-somethings are at family friendly gatherings where everyone shows up mainly to eat, make as little conversation as possible and then get out of there. They are my nephews, the first of the boys to grace our family and they seem to be so certain about life, to know so much, they are going somewhere and sound hopeful that they will make it. I sit on the outskirts of their lives, perched on the hem of the family fringe and may never really know them much.

Most weeks I find myself at the homeless shelter to lend a hand and while I am there I scan the faces of the young twenty-somethings. Beneath the knit stocking caps and above the overgrown facial hair of the men I am looking for those blue eyes that belong to one of my twenty-somethings. I know those eyes. I watched them blink open surrounded by the purple and white blotches that covered his face on the day he was born. I was only seventeen and as I watched my sister give birth to him I thought for sure he was born dead, but he was very much alive.

A twenty-something girl that I had just met told me her story last week. The shelter is her home. She is not allowed to use there. The adults in the home she grew up in encourage her to use but she would rather be homeless. I found hope in her story.

The beeper went off at three in the morning last week. I was too far gone in my sleep to say good-bye to Mr. T as he left for the hospital. He was the chaplain on call. The ambulance arrived with another one of our twenty-somethings. He should have died but he was very much alive. He told his step-mom that the sight of Mr. T gave him a feeling of peace.

I heard that my blue-eyed twenty-something got on a train and headed to another city. He was accepted into rehab. It will be hard for me to stop my habit of scanning the faces at the shelter this week. I found hope in the story about his train ride.

I look back on my own twenty-something years and acknowledge that I was a know-it-all, gonna-do-it-my-way kind of gal. I learned many things the hard way but I am glad I have made it this far. I read this poem while reading the book This Beautiful Mess. It reminds me of myself and the twenty-somethings in my life. I hope they make it.

when my brothers were too young to be wise

When my brothers were too young to be wise
but too old to name things creatively,
they invented a game called:
Let's take turns jumping off Tom's roof
and throw the cat after the person who jumped.
At least they took turns...

Later, when my brothers were too young to be wise
but old enough to put their scientific knowledge to use,
they played a game called:
Let's pour gas over this giant pile of weeds
and then light it on fire.
At least the doctor said
that their eyebrows will grow back...

Later, when my brother was old enough to be depressed
but too young to know how to cope,
he would play a game called:
Let's go to Tom's house and do a lot of drugs
and drink all his step-dad's beer.
At least there was that one English teacher
who asked if something was wrong...
but what could you say?
We are so poorly equipped to deal with these troubles,
and there are so few doctors of the soul these days...
What is there to do?
I know some people who fight it all their lives,
kicking against the goads till they bleed to death.
Others, like Dad, ignore it,
thinking that hard work, sunshine, and
the passing of time will resolve it.
Still others, like Mom, ostracize and cast blame
by leaving condemnatory evangelical polemics taped
to your bathroom mirror.

But now my brothers and I are old enough
to begin to be wise,
yet still young enough to climb the cold roof
to talk and to smoke.
So I will play a new game with you called:
Let's go together and bear one another's burdens.
At least I will not laugh at your pain,
I will not try to fix your problems,
I will not ignore your suffering
or condemn you with my piety...
I will simply lie here next to you in the cold
while we breathe our smoky prayers to God.

-Raeben Nolan

You Make Me Smile

2010-01-27T12:53:00.000-08:00

So last week was my birthday and now I am right on the very crumbly edge of my thirties and hanging on by my toenails until next year rolls around. Then I start the free fall into my forties. What is it about this crazy thing we call life? I had many wonderful birthday moments but this one really made me smile, big, like big cheesy show all your teeth smile and it even caused the gift giver to whip out the camera and snap a picture.

Her she is. My sweet present presenter, this woman here, the lady in the blue hat and scarf, my sister, Tanya. Out of all my sisters she is closest to me in age and this summer I drug her around to all the artsy fartsy places I could find on the Oregon Coast. She knows how I caught the art bug on the east coast and willingly went with me to feed my appetite for art. We found a funky off the road cottage that had the most wonderful pottery. One artist in particular I loved. LOVED and raved about because of the amazing faces that adorned each piece.
Raving must be a good thing because she went back and bought the smiling bowl for me and being such a sneak has saved it all this time just to make me smile on my birthday. I love her! Not just because she gives me good gifts, even though I must admit that is an influencing factor, but because she will laughingly do what I ask her to do. Such as... pose for these pictures as if I am a professional photographer. Work it, sister!
A more serious pose and a striking resemblance of our mother that makes my heart sad and happy at the same time. Sometimes I get the sense that she is tiring of my fun and games. Maybe this full length shot is reflective of that.
I never would have guessed that she would tire of my shenanigans until one fateful day as we drove around Portland with my girls in the back seat. From the front we could hear my youngest girl bossing her older sister with much disdain and pleasure in her voice. As I tried to calm the situation I glanced over at Tanya and said, "Can you believe that?" Shockingly she said that it all sounded very familiar to her. Awkward silence lingered and then I casually asked if there was something I had done or been doing that bugs her. More awkward silence and then she let it out, "Whenever we have a family get together you plan all these things to do and you make everyone play games. I don't think you even notice that we don't want to play your games but everyone does."

My happy go lucky attitude was cut to the quick, I felt really bad, apologized and then wincing asked if there was more. "Nope, that's it." she said. "That's it,Game Nazi, that's all you've got on me!" I fired back. Yep was all she said and just thinking back on the whole conversation makes me SMILE.

The Heart

2010-01-25T19:27:00.000-08:00

Our house just got a brand new heart.

"'Cause your hot then you're cold"
I wonder if Katy Perry's Hot N' Cold song makes anyone else think of an HVAC system. No matter what anyone else says, heating and cooling is important and I'll be humming this one line all day.

Shingles. The good kind. Not the disease.

The view from an upstairs window. Me, you can't really see me but if you did you would see that I am just waiting for spring to come and for this house to be done and really come alive with its new family living inside

Trade As One - Last Christmas Post - Part 5

2010-01-22T15:39:00.000-08:00

(This is part five of a five-part series capturing ideas and things that I want to remember from Christmas 2009. Read Part 1 here, Part 2 here, Part 3 here, and Part 4 here)

I am not sure what I was thinking when I ventured to capture those ideas that I wanted to capture from Christmas. And I knew it, to much time has passed and I already forgot what part six was going to be. Cursed age and memory loss. The photos sitting on the camera card helped jog my memory for part five. So if you were counting on a part six, sorry, there will only be five. This particular Christmas find was one of my favorites. Drum roll please....

Ta da! Trade As One.

I learned about Trade As One from Advent Conspiracy and here is my basic version of what Trade As One does. First it gives those people who live in extreme poverty who want to work and produce goods a pathway to market. The second thing it does is give people who have buying power the opportunity to think about their purchases and make purchases that can make a difference in an individual or group of individuals lives. Fair Trade essentially and that is about all I know. I did give it a shot though.

On Trade As One's shopping page I went straight for the chocolate and before I had a chance to buy on-line I found it for sale at our local Fred Meyer in the organic section. The chocolate I am talking about is Divine Chocolate and it is fabulous. I loved that their story was written on the inside of the wrapper. The teenagers in my life received these bars as Christmas gifts and they were intrigued by the fair trade story. Maybe it will lead to some sort of divine inspiration in their lives. One can only hope.

I told the fair trade story to my Grandma too. She thought it would be wonderful to have the birthday cards she sends to the grandkiddos also help someone living in poverty. It didn't hurt that I told her how really hip and cool this would make her. That counts when you are ninety-three.

She already forgot about the whole thing when the cards arrived but was really excited when I told her again and then again. She liked that hip and cool part, again too. "The cards came from artisans in Africa and Turkey" I told her. "Who are these cards for?"she asked. This caused me to scrunch my nose and then she gave me that really sad look and then sternly told me how frustrating it is not to remember. Then I launched into my living life gracefully speech that went something like this..."getting older has to be like pregnancy. You know at some point people are going to see you at your worst and you grit your teeth and bare it, literally because many people are going to see you naked when that baby comes. Then you have to nurse that baby and you know that in the course of those breastfeeding years everyone you know will have seen your nipples. Fully exposed you just try to live through the whole thing as gracefully as you can. Right?"

This is my style for giving advice and support in difficult times and while it is not much it is still something. She really did not like my advice because she changed the subject on me and asked who all these cards were for. So in case I forget it is documented here on my blog.

About Smexy and Other Words

2010-01-20T08:43:00.000-08:00

I used the word smexy in one of my recent posts. Smexy is just one of the many words I have learned while living with this...cough, cough...what shall I say....excuse me...TEENAGER. This lovely teenager happens to be my niece who has given up her spacious bedroom to us and moved herself into the ever so small guest room until our house is finished. In the mean time, I am living in a constant state of amusement by the things she does and more importantly by what she says. Smexy is usually accompanied by the word "hot" when a good looking hard bodied guy appears on the television. She's told me to chillax on a number of occasions. Last week we were informed that we scared the shiz out of her. The whole fam can thank the movie "The Hangover" for the latest and greatest word that graces our ears, ratard.

I've given her a few good ...cough, cough...words myself... from my granny-grab-bag. Things like good gravy, fiddlesticks, shnikes, and zoinks. Surprisingly they are in the Urban Dictionary and some appear to be replacement words for some really bad profanity. So I will not include the links to my words but to be honest my replacement words really helped me come out of a bad cursing habit I picked up in my early twenties.
As a matter a fact Mr. T was surprised when I told him that I used to cuss like a truck driver. He did not believe me until one night when I played a game of paint ball sniper with him and his friend, Duane. Apparently, in the game of sniper, if you are hit you become the sniper and turn on your used-to-be team mate. I just happened to be about ten feet away from Duane when he shot me, unmercifully, multiple times. As I laid on the ground rolling around all my bad words came pouring out and then I wasn't quite so smexy.

An American Clergyman

2010-01-18T08:51:00.000-08:00

Reference points. Everyone has them. They are those little events in time, blips, images, words, speeches and actions that come across the screens of our minds through media of all shapes and sizes. If we are not careful these points become more than mere points, perhaps hooks, that we hang our notions upon.

Martin Luther King Jr.'s "I Have a Dream" speech has been a point turned hook for me. I am about 53 minutes away from finishing the audio version of Dr. King's autobiography and now realize that my reference point is nothing more than a tiny pixel in the overall portrait of Martin Luther King Jr. The hook itself now blends in with the rest of King's life and my vague ideas have floated away.

The audio version of King's autobiography includes his recorded speeches as they sit in the text. It is a powerful and amazing look into America's past, the idea and pursuit of non-violent protest to bring about justice for the oppressed and much more than I could ever cover in a blog post. King's Letter from Birmingham Jail pierced my heart. A thoughtful and complete response to eight white Alabama clergymen who told him to wait and battle segregation out in the courts is a great example of handling Christian diplomacy. Knowing more about this key figure in our country's historical landscape has made this day that honors his life much more meaningful.

Framed

2010-01-13T09:15:00.000-08:00

Dear New Jersey,

Just a quick note. This is what the sky really looks like. You tried and almost won me over with your lovely shore and smexy metropolises. It is true that sometimes I cry in my pillow because I miss all your beautiful leafy trees and historical sights and then I see this, the multi-colored horizon and sigh to myself and say, "ah... home." I thought you should know.

Sincerely,

Me

The framing is done. I thought I still had a few days to blog about something else but darn our builders are fast. This is what the house looked like yesterday at about 4:30 p.m. I was just in time to capture an amazing sunset.

Raisin' the Roof

2010-01-11T08:57:00.000-08:00

Construction is happening so fast. The roof trusses showed up at 6:30 this morning and I have not even blogged about the second story framing. Years ago when I worked with construction project managers there was one, isn't there always one, guy who drove me crazy when I came to status his project. "Hey Bill, how's the project going ?" was my normal opening line. With out hesitation his response was, "Humping, we're humping!" Bill's project was always humping and I cringed to hear that because childish playground memories of kids using that word "humping" for something else amid giggles and red faces still floods my mind at the sound of that word.

Mr. T knows about Bill and my project statusing days and because he loves me so much he reminded me about our project and how the crew was really humping on the house. Is there no shame?

Back to the project. The above picture is the view from the kitchen into the living room.

The second story - bedrooms, bathrooms and laundry room all upstairs.

Just wondering how the washer and dryer are going to make it up and around that bend.

Here is the foyer window view from the second story. You can see a tiny smidgen of the Columbia River from this spot and that is what I have always dreamed of. A beautiful river view with a nuclear reservation strategically stationed in the background simply takes my breath away. The plan called for a fancy plant shelf in the window. I had them take it out because I really do not like to dust. How do you clean up there any way? Plus cobwebs and a dirty shelf might cloud the view.

Building progress from last week was captured by Mr. T and posted on his blog. Two wonderful pictures if you want to check it out.

Painlessness

2010-01-07T09:18:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I take for granted the painless side of my first born child's illness.

Three years ago I peered into my son's beautiful brown eyes and noticed that the once milky white of the eye had become considerably red. Squinting my own eyes and looking intently into his I took a deep breath and gave my diagnosis, Pink Eye. Seeing that I am only the mother and not really a doctor I called the pediatrician to set up an appointment to confirm my suspicions. Suspicions confirmed. I was right. Pink Eye it was...

...for about two days and then our lives were flooded by eye drops and medical terms like idiopathic, overactive immune system and Uveitis. Fields of medicine that I fail to pronounce and spell correctly invaded our world. Sometimes I catch myself shaking my head and laughing a bit in disbelief at it all because even my computer's spell checker does not recognize words such as pediatric rheumatology and opthalmology.

Through it all there is one word that describes my boy, Stoic. He has been unmoved, without complaint, pretty much passionless. I am leaning toward the idea that he is this way because the disease for him is relatively painless and more of a mere inconvenience.

On Wednesday we headed to the hospital for treatment which is happening about every six weeks. The ease and painlessness that usually accompanies our visit was ushered out of the room and replaced with painfulness as attempts to start an IV line failed multiple times. The once stoic boy was now anxious and in the midst of his pain I felt helpless. Just as our third nurse was attempting poke number twelve she looked at me and said, "This is where I ask the moms to pray that it works."

Sometimes spoken words are like light that break through the clouds and in that moment I realized that in the ease of painlessness I had succumbed to prayerlessness. To be honest I am sad about Wednesday and my need for God in the midst of the pain and not all the other times we go in for treatment. An epiphany of sorts about myself on Wednesday, January 6th, Epiphany day.

Framed, Almost

2010-01-05T15:01:00.000-08:00

What can I say? Framing has begun.

Looking good.

Cade is actually in the port-a-potty doing his business when I took this picture. I knew I would finally get one of the kids in there.

Then the neighbor drove up and as we stood there in the street together admiring the house the noises coming from the little green booth were quite embarrassing and in that moment I regretted just a tiny smidgen that I convinced my child to go in.

A Hobbit's Gift - Part 4

2010-01-04T09:00:00.000-08:00

(This is part four of five-part series capturing ideas and things that I want to remember from Christmas 2009. Read Part 1 here, Part 2 here, Part 3 here and Part 5 here)

Teaching my kids the historical context of Christmas and how this celebration came into existence is something I look forward to each year.

Why? I sometimes ask myself. Then I go and take a long look in the mirror and slowly mouth my confession. "I am a history weirdy."

There it is the ugly truth about myself but who can deny the fun to be had in learning historical facts and interesting traditions. Ooh la la! One of my favorite days in the whole year just happens to be on December 6th celebrating the life of a certain someone who wore mostly red, was very generous and reeks of gingerbread. In the many years following his death he has gained quite a bit of a cult following and tons of rumors swirl about him and his amazing once-a-year world wide magical feats.

Did you guess, Santa Claus? Well try getting a little physical with Santa and unbuckle that big black belt and kick off the boots then you might find a red bishop's robe and a real historical figure underneath in the person of Saint Nicholas of Myra. His anonymous generosity is what I like most about him and the fact that he really lived.

This year the kids woke up on December 6th with a Hobbit's gift in their shoe in celebration of St. Nicholas. Something simple and small enough to fit inside a shoe in keeping with the Nicholas tradition and old like our friendship in keeping with the Hobbit tradition. The Hobbit side of the gift was new this year and the kids loved it. A manly Japanese box, hot chocolate stein and glass paper weights purchased from an antique store captured their attention.

Who says history has to be boring?

Wood

2010-01-03T08:06:00.001-08:00

"You know I need a lot of wood around me Jerry. Wood, Jerry. Wood."
picture taken from Cosmo Kramer -Wikipedia

Wood, Baby, Wood. A truck came and dropped off a whole lota wood. Even with the snow falling two hard working guys put in the floor joists. It is difficult not to drive by the lot and say the above Seinfeld quote. Hopefully framing this week!

Christmas Book Pick for 2009 - Part 3

2010-01-02T13:44:00.000-08:00

(This is part three of a six-part series capturing the ideas and things that I want to remember from Christmas 2009. Read Part 1 here, Part 2 here, and Part 4 here)

Each year I try to add another book to our Christmas collection. I saw this book at Barnes and Noble around Thanksgiving. It is a Christmas Poem by Maya Angelou and once I saw that it came with a CD of her reading the poem I was sold. Her voice is captivating and her poetry has strength and eloquence.

The sound of her voice carries me back in time to when I first heard her speak while I was in college. Me in the CUB at Washington State University and her thousands of miles away in Washington DC at a presidential inauguration. Her tone of voice and words boomed through the big screen TV and there I sat mesmerized and drooling.

Amazing Peace is wonderful. I am not sure the kids appreciate it as much as I do so I keep reminding them that Maya Angelou is a writer and a poet alive, RIGHT NOW, during their life time. They think her voice is strange and it makes me smile because up in the driver's seat of the car I can hear each of them with deep voices repeating the last lines of the poem as they sit behind me in the backseat of the car.

Peace, My Brother.
Peace, My Sister.
Peace, My Soul.

And that is what this mom's heart hopes for.

Giving Presence - Part 2

2010-01-01T09:47:00.000-08:00

(This is part two of a six-part series capturing the ideas and things that I want to remember from Christmas 2009. Read Part 1 here, Part 3 here Part 4 here)

Here are the pictures promised from Part 1 of this post. My girl, Natalie in the "Church Lady" apron. She is so adorable. The pattern, fabric and a special request for a sewing lesson was her Christmas gift to her Grandma. I must say that my mother-in-law, Lois, is amazing with the sewing machine.

Hmmm. I wonder what Natalie's favorite color is these days?

Jlyn's gift to her Grandma was this pretty pillow case pattern and fabric. On Christmas morn Lois and the girls began their projects. As I worked on a puzzle in another room I could hear Jlyn telling Lois that when she grew up she was going to teach her granddaughters how to sew.

A nice project for a sweet girlie who still has a hard time sitting still. Oh no! Why are those knees bending?

Musssssssstttttttttttt not stand stillllllllllll..................

Up, up, up in the air. Hey, cute shoes!

The girls found the patterns and fabric kits at the local Craft Warehouse just in case the sight of these sewing projects causes those crafting juices to seep from your pores.

Twenty Ten

2010-01-01T09:45:00.000-08:00

With much celebration 2010 was rung in.

As of 10:20 am everyone is still sleeping in.

Happy New Year to one and all!

Giving Presence Part 1

2009-12-31T07:48:00.000-08:00

(This is part one of a six-part series capturing the ideas and things that I liked and want to remember from Christmas 2009. Read Part 2 here, Part 3 here, and Part 4 here.)

I first learned about the season of Advent when I married Mr. T. It overwhelms me sometimes that there is more to December 25th than I ever imagined. Searching out information about the history of this Christian Church observance that centers around Christmas has become a passion of mine. Yet with all the knowledge gained there seems to be a nagging tension of how do we, our family, observe Advent and still keep our American heritage of giving gifts and adding all the green and red magic of Christmas alive.

Last year's stint in Portland, Oregon allowed us to be a part of the Imago Dei Community. This particular Christian church addresses and lives out my nagging question and much more through Advent Conspiracy and its basic principles of - Worship Fully, Spend Less, Give More, Love All. The best gift we have received from the conspiracy is simply...freedom.

Giving more presence, relationship gifts, was a personal favorite. The ideas have expanded from last year but they are simple things like:

A sewing project given to Grandma Lois with a special request that she show two girls how to sew.
A garden stepping stone making kit for Jlyn and the flower garden she and Craig are putting in at the new house. The flower garden was her request.
Movie tickets for Grandad and the kids to go to the movies.
A late night drive around town showing my Grandma all the Christmas lights. She loved it since she never gets out at night.
Camera lessons and frame making kits for Natalie from Craig.
A card organizer and a monthly date with my Grandma to help her get birthday cards out to all the grand and great-grand children. She still puts a one dollar bill in the card. How cute is that?
Rocket making kit and a blast off invitation for Cade and Craig.

Since I ran the batteries down on the camera the pictures will have to come in the next post.

Christmas Fading

2009-12-30T10:01:00.000-08:00

This time of year reminds me of a fast moving train. Engine 2009 has made all its stops and is barreling down the track to New Year Station and the previous stop, Christmas Junction, is fading away and losing focus.

Christmas was very different this year for us since we are sharing living space with our extended family while our house is being built. All of our treasured holiday implements are tucked away in storage and yet we survived. There are a few moments and things learned from this year's celebration that I continue to ponder in my heart and do not want to forget. Thus the next few posts will be about the things I loved most about Christmas 2009 just in case some unfortunate event, maybe... memory loss, happens. Then all will be saved on the glorious blog.

Transcending: Words on Women and Strength by Kelly Corrigan

2009-12-29T08:38:00.001-08:00

I received the link to this video through an e-mail as a Christmas gift from a friend. It has been viewed by millions and I think I know why. It gave my soul a virtual hug. You know the type of hug that happens between our fellow women sojourners. I thought of my Mom and my sisters, mostly my sister Des and her ability to live strong through tough times. Grab a tissue if you must.

Marry Chrismas

2009-12-28T09:07:00.000-08:00

It's Monday! My official laundry day. Snow is falling soft outside and slowly the piles of laundry inside are dwindling away. I have time, lots of time, to reflect on the past week and Christmas. Earlier this month, paper thin flat packages kept showing up under the tree courtesy of our youngest daughter. Wow! A classroom setting has really brought out the artist in Jlyn and it was exciting to open up all her masterpieces on Christmas morning.

Each package had a wonderful card with a phonetically correct version of Merry Christmas on it. The red and green chrismas monsters were my favorite as was the holidays around the world booklet she made at school.

Here she is with her domino chicken creation inspired from one of our family favorites, Chicken Foot. Not the hard rock supergroup, Chickenfoot, which happens to make my 80's big hair rock band heart skip a beat with Sammy Hagar, Joe Satriani and Chad Smith. Okay, I am teasing and telling a lie because I must honestly admit that my favorite thing about the 80's was Prince and Madonna. Despite my taste in music, if you have a box of dominoes, check out the game chicken foot. It is really fun.

Sister to Sister

2009-12-27T08:49:00.000-08:00

Moving away or maybe growing older has helped me realize the importance of family. I love my sista family. All the gals on the left side of this picture have known me my entire life. These ladies are my older sisters. From the top of the picture to the bottom they are - Selina, Des and Tanya. They are my one and only sisters who all have August birthdays and told me I was the oddball of the family and most likely adopted. Which is so not true!

Even Tracey has an August birthday. Growing up she and I wanted to be sisters so bad that we tried to get my mom and her dad together. It wasn't long after my parents' divorce and Tracey's mom passed away that our brilliant idea was formed. Never mind that our moms had been best of friends it just made our plan even more perfect in our heads. Dreamily we talked about how we could all be like a Brady Bunch family except with mostly girls. Finally after much pleading on our part, Big Larry and Karen went on a date. One word describes that date, AWKWARD and our sister dream was dashed.

Selina had one trick up her sleeve and married Tracey's brother, Larry, and now somehow we are almost related like sisters. We had fun getting together last week and did a girls day out wine tasting thingy. The beautiful wooden doors pictured above are at Terra Blanca in Benton City.

We found this cute shop in Prosser, Washington and I made Tanya hold my hand for the picture. Being the youngest causes me to be bossy sometimes and I had to laugh because my older sister usually complies with my wishes.
This building is part of the wine tasting mall in Prosser. I'll say it again, wine tasting mall. I am not sure I will ever get used to all the changes back here at home but honestly the buildings are beautifully designed and the interior layouts are exceptional. Anyway, behind these doors I found my most favorite wine. I love it mostly for its clever name and marketing. B Lovely. I did a few quiet hand claps and a few on-the- tip-of-my-toe jumps when the shop keeper said they had it in stock which embarrassed my sisters and that is what I am here for... to fulfill my youngest sister role and embarrass my sisters.

Bella an Italian Deli

2009-12-26T13:04:00.000-08:00

This is one of my favorite finds in moving back to the south eastern parts of Washington State. It is called Bella and it just so happens to be in that funny farm village I grew up in. Who knew! Something so quaint and warm hearted could find its way there. Then again look at my sisters and me, the four of us together for a girls day outing, I must admit that we have survived quite nicely. As for Bella I will have to give credit where credit is due and this is just one of the niceties of living in an area where viticulture and the wine industry is turning cow pastures and sage brush into something more noble...vines and wines.

Bella is in Benton City, Washington. It is a one room restaurant in a small cottage right off the main street going into town. The dark wooden beams and rich paint colors are reminiscent of a Hobbit eatery that one might find within the pages of Tolkien's Lord of the Rings.

A long wooden communal table sits in the center of the room. We learned that the table was made from 200 year old barn boards by an Italian artist in New York State. Conversation with the owners and wait staff is friendly and fun. I enjoyed the stories about their venture into small town business and the talk about the surrounding wineries that continue to grow.

The food is amazing. Beautiful desserts, soups, salads and Panini sandwiches with kettle potato chips that are made on site are a few of the yummy things you might find there. It is a tad on the spendy side but well worth the drive and experience. You MUST go there if you are in the neighborhood but check their hours of business before you go. Benissimo!

A Critical Deliverable

2009-12-23T10:50:00.001-08:00

In my old project management days this is what we called a major project necessity and in my mind a critical deliverable. I keep trying to entice the kids and cousins to go use the portable toilet since we are paying for it. So far there are no takers.

The cement mixer was here two days ago and in the middle of December our construction crew poured the foundation. The forms were taken down yesterday and as the steam was coming off the cured concrete I thought to myself what a beautiful sight!

I'm Diggin' This

2009-12-18T08:43:00.001-08:00

The construction crew is really the ones doing the digging and we are just diggin' the idea that work has finally begun. Day 1 of house construction. Hurray!

An Advent Sun Rise

2009-12-14T10:17:00.000-08:00

This is what happens in my mind (a poem of sorts) when the Advent Season unfolds, breathtaking sunrises appear on the way to deliver kids to school, and reading one of my most favorite books, James and the Giant Peach, with Natalie.

The Glorious Peachy Sunrise of Advent

In my rear view mirror I saw the sun wrapped in flesh.
Full and round in brilliant shades of orange with hints of pinks and pale yellows
Its beauty reminiscent of a summer peach warm and soft.
The break of day squeezed from the glorious fruit thick juice
That traveled in continuous horizontal streams across the pallid sky.
Waiting for the syrupy flow of warmth to envelope the earth
It hung suspended in air and in moments met the necessity of winter
And melted away into golden strands of light.

The light illuminates and quietly invades the realities of a winter's day.
The bones of a tree laid bare by the loss of its leaves.
Rivers chilled and choked with chunks of themselves.
A woman bundled up and beside herself.
Each numb from the effects of the season and yet fully alive.
Alive where life and light mix.
Beneath the bark of a tree green shoots are forming.
Under the blanket of river ice creatures are growing.
Within the woman she sometimes questions
And then seems to be knowing.

Out my windshield I saw the road before me.
Smooth and black with guiding lines of yellow and white.
The shining eyes of cars streamed together
Forming glowing snakes across the open arid canvas of nature.
In full light they are just shells of machines
Reminding me that I am just one traveler out of many.
A longing in my heart is hopeful
That the beautiful sun that was behind me would return again before me.
With an entrance so glorious
That the veil of winter would evaporate away into nothingness.

The glowing sun on a winter's day transports my mind
To the Once Upon a Time Land found within the pages of children's literature.
My head filled with the fanciful thoughts
Of a cantankerous old friend and his forty-two legs
But mostly of his melodious comparative response
Of living upon redemption wrapped in flesh.

..."'Now comes,' the Centipede declared,
'the burden of my speech:
These foods are rare beyond compare-some
are right out of reach;
But there's no doubt I'd go without
A million plates of each
For one small mite,
One tiny bite
Of this FANTASTIC PEACH!'"

Thanks A Lot

2009-11-19T08:45:00.001-08:00

What you see in the picture above has been occupying much of my time. I have been working this piece of land pretty hard. Not the blood, sweat and tears type of labor but the slap a smile on my face, expose all our personal financial information and then hand over our money type of work to buy this lot.

Now we are the proud owners of a chunk of earth. It seems weird to say that but at this point in my life I'll just play along with it. Over the next four to five months a bunch of sticks and happenings will be going on and in the end we should have a house to live in and the kids will be one step closer to having a dog.
I am happy and thankful because our transaction was with friends or should I say our old neighbors. Which means we will be their new neighbors and living just one door down from my sister and brother-in-law. We are kinda living an "Everybody Loves Raymond" type of dream and the gray pointy house in the picture is theirs. I must admit that from our new house I'll be able to keep my eyes on that feisty niece and clever nephew of mine and of course live real close to my sister. Yes, my eldest sister who during our youthful years vowed that I would never have my own room because she would live at home until I graduated from high school. Everything she said about sharing a room came to pass just as she had foretold. Guess what? Now she is stuck with me and Craig too.

A Hair Raising Experience

2009-11-16T08:53:00.001-08:00

This experience is still near and vivid in my mind even though it happened shortly after we moved in with my sister and her family about a month ago. I noticed that the upstairs bathroom sinks were not draining quickly and when I used my niece Sierra's sink it backed up completely. Knowing that this house is not that old and eying the jumbo-year supply-bottle of Liquid Plumber under the sink I had a hunch about what was going on with the pipes in this house.

Sierra is the beauty gracing my blog header. You can't see her face in the picture only her hindsight. When facing her head on the first thing most people notice is her long mane of dark thick hair. My hunch was dead on. Hair clogs! I spotted the first one after all the kids brushed their teeth before bed time. It was foamy white from all the tooth paste and before the kids could blink, I had grabbed a coat hanger, unraveled it MacGyver style, and snaked out that hair clog. There were screams of disgust as the kids saw what came out of the drain and as Sierra walked by she begged me not to touch her sink.

Once the kids settled down and the lights were out I went in and sat down on Sierra's bed for a heart to heart. "How do you think I learned how to turn a hanger into plumber's tool?" I asked her gently. Then I went on, "Long hair comes with a price tag, clogged drains, broken down hair ensnared vacuum cleaners and long strands all over your clothes. Your clogged drain is a small price to pay for your beautiful hair and I know this because I had big, okay, HUGE 80's hair. Now I have regrets about that hair. But from one big haired sister to another, will you PLEASE let me unclog your sink when everyone is at school tomorrow?" On a side note this is the picture that was on my 20 year class reunion name tag. What was I thinking and why didn't someone stop me?

So the next morning, when the coast was clear and everyone was gone I strapped on the old head lamp and went to work cleaning out the pipes. A few ferret sized hair clogs were pulled from the depths that day and a feeling of accomplishment came over me. A small price to pay for big sexy hair!

When the Familiar Seems Foreign

2009-11-09T08:58:00.000-08:00

I like it when encouragement comes in the voices and words of other people and that is what happened last week. A few of you mentioned that you miss my blog postings and seriously that brings joy to my heart. To me blogging is a funny thing. Even if my fingers are not busily typing out my thoughts and experiences I am still all the while silently blogging in my head. I was glad to read that this same thing happens to my blogger friend, JoyfuLiving, and that more than likely it is a normal experience for people who like to write.

A lot of my silent blogs this past month have turned into prayers and it is probably best if they are not spoken/written on my blog. Heaven forbid some of you might see the icky crappy junk that goes on in my heart and mind but the main reason I have not posted is that I do not want Hindsight to be a place where I rant and then rave and then rant some more. Sheesh, that is one of the joys of marriage and so I am thankful that Craig is here to listen as I process my thoughts.

So for the sake of Hindsight, I must say that looking back upon the last few years I must have stuck some of my likes and dislikes about our hometown into some boxes in my mind. I think maybe to protect my heart from being so sad that we moved away from here. About two years into our Princeton move a light bulb went on inside my head that gave me the idea that more than likely we would never go back home. Guess what happened? Here we are back home and so it is that some things that for most of my life were so familiar now seem so foreign.

The picture above is of the small agricultural town I grew up in. Last month as the fall leaves were vibrant and bright I ventured out to take some pictures of a new winery outside of the town. I was struck by the beauty I saw and could not for the life of me remember this place being so beautiful. I shared my thoughts with the young woman at the winery and she said something interesting. She said that she always thought the town was just a hole but after working at the winery and from its vantage point she decided it really was a beautiful place.

I have been thinking about that vantage point thingy a lot lately. Any insights out there about perspective?

Taking Notice

2009-10-06T08:35:00.000-07:00

I had to laugh about Craig's reaction to my last post. The blog post about being the spouse of a pastor that I found on the Fermi project blog was informative and I posted about it because I thought it might be useful to someone out here in the world of blogging. However, it seemed to signal that I feel isolated and depressed.

To set the record straight I do not feel either depressed or isolated. My anxiety levels have been up and down through our move and my new found admiration for Hostess Cupcakes, Twinkies and Ding Dongs does not necessarily mean one is depressed. I call it coping. The kind of coping that only spongy cake and fluffy filling can satisfy. Which leads me to wonder what ever happened to the Hostess Suzie Q. I've noticed that it is no longer stocked and for sale on the super market shelf. I've also noticed that my sister's clothes dryer heats way to hot and is causing all my pants to shrink. I've been noticing a lot of things....

A.K.A - The Pastor's Wife

2009-10-01T10:30:00.000-07:00

I stumbled upon this blog post(just click on this post's title and there you have it, it will take you to the article) by Shari Thomas called the Quiet Fight and thought of my friends out there who have their very own identity but sadly get labeled the PW.

Reading the article took me back, back to times of sitting out at the picnic tables in front of our apartment in Princeton and listening to the ideas and hopes of our friends who were in seminary and also the conversations of the spouses and what it may look like once school is over. This article highlights a common fear that we sometimes discussed. Depression and isolation.

Any thoughts out there in blog land about this subject?

Coming up to Breathe

2009-09-30T11:11:00.000-07:00

I've been buried under the wave of all things moving and now I am coming up to take a breath, process my thoughts, and write again. I am not sure how long until the next wave comes but for now I will just breath deep, exhale and let it all hang out it this post.

September was a rush. A rush to get kids into school, move out of our townhouse in Portland, move our stuff into storage and a big rush to buy a house. In the midst of rushing there was waiting. Waiting to have the house we were buying inspected. Waiting to find out if the roof needed replacing. Waiting to see if the seller would indeed lower the price so we could replace the roof and in the end I learned a new word RESCISSION. Rescission is a decision to not buy the house and now we are homeless. Which in my opinion is a good thing. Okay it is not really true about the homeless thing because we are living with my eldest sister, Selina, and her hubby Larry plus those two kiddos that have graced some of the pictures of my blog. Yeah that is Sierra's hind shot on my blog header. She and I are getting real close, so close that she asked to borrow one of my shirts yesterday. I guess something in my closet is still cool for school and to be clear it was a normal school day not one of those flash back to the eighties spirit week days.

Cooking for nine has been interesting and to be honest I am having fun being here. Here would be living in the house we owned, rented and then sold to my sister and her family last year when the glimmer of hope of ever moving back was dim. I am living a hindsight moment and okay the hope of moving back here was a little dim but we really needed to sell the house and they needed a bigger one to accommodate Gram moving in with them. Gram decided about a week before Craig got an interview at the Chaplaincy that she wanted to move to an assisted living apartment and BINGO that left the guest room open for us.

It is amazing how things have fallen in and out of place. It is nothing we could have planned or even unplanned. It is totally open and undone. It has paved the way for us to know our family in new ways by being geographically close to one other and of course all the beautiful people we have met along the way does cause me to pause and thoughtfully breath deep. It is God. God at work and in control and I really like it.

We've Got Joy

2009-09-11T06:58:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, Joy came to town. There is Joy right between Tracey and me. Because Joy came to town I got to spend one of my final days of living in Portland playing tour guide and taking in the amazing gifts this eclectic city has to offer.We rode the Max, the light rail train, in and walked to numerous spots mainly in the Pearl District of Portland. I've been waiting a while to snap a picture of the Princeton Building in downtown Portland. It makes me miss our east coast adventures. I still have not found out why it is called the Princeton Building.
Our next stop was First Presbyterian Church of Portland. I have eyed this church for a while on our other visits to downtown. Notice how amazingly blue the sky is. No signs of rain and a most wonderful day.
It never hurts to ask to go inside places and I was glad I asked to go inside this church. Visitors are welcome as long as you sign in. Stepping inside the sanctuary did not disappoint. The stained glass window is absolutely beautiful, peaceful and stirs something inside to be worshipful.

The intricate wood seating and architecture is breathtaking. The magnificent pipe organ draws your attention to the front of the church and the communion table.

As we walked out I noticed that their new pastor just happens to be the pastor of the church Craig grew up going to in Richland, Washington. It is a small world after all. We left there filled up and with Joy we continued on our way.

Uh oh! Those pesky packing boxes are calling and soon the moving truck will be here. Hopefully I'll be able to post the rest of the pictures before this computer gets packed away. Stay tuned.

Moonstruck Chocolate Cafe

2009-09-10T07:34:00.000-07:00

There is a sweet little secret that I have yet to tell about Portland. It involves hand crafted chocolate and by far the best and least expensive Mexican Mocha in town.

This is the place I am talking about. Moonstruck Chocolate Cafe. Yes, a chocolate cafe. Who knew there was such a place in all the world?

The chocolates are handcrafted by chocolate artists. I think I want to be a chocolate artist. When you go here you enter into a world of creativity where chocolate is molded into magical creations like sea creatures, kitty cats, chocolate lab puppies and the list goes on and on.
Then there are the elegant chocolates like the Pure Gold and Champagne Truffles. Taste testing is allowed so you can make sure you are making the perfect chocolate choice.

Ummmm! The Mexican mocha.To me a Mexican mocha is like drinking chocolate sheath cake. Need I say more?
I am going to miss my sister Des when I leave Portland. She indulged me and went to get sweets last night even though she does not really like sugary desserts and she even let me take her picture. Sisterly love at work, one giving and the other taking.
I had fun watching Taylor pick out the chocolates. This is what she came up with - the Oreo Cone, the Mayan, and the Pure Gold truffle.

Unpacking the First Day of School

2009-09-08T07:10:00.001-07:00

In the midst of packing up our place in Portland I am doing a little unpacking of those first day of school photos.
This is a gem. I am not sure Jlyn has ever been up this early and her hair is absolutely crazy in the morning.
We started the morning by toasting the day with sparkling cider and requests from Nat to keep the camera away from her.
Cousin Nate was happy to have us with him and obviously not camera shy. This was Nate's second week of school and he was overjoyed to have bubbly juice for breakfast.

Out the door and on their way to a new adventure.

At the end of their very first day of high school and middle school Sierra and Cade were all smiles. Just stop growing up already!

The First Day - Letting Go

2009-09-02T11:49:00.000-07:00

This move and the transition of the kids into public school reminds me of my third pregnancy. Everything just seems to snap back into place as if it is all familiar territory. School shopping in Portland was a whirl-wind experience and registration in Richland on Monday was fun as people remembered us and were excited to have us back.

The BIG day was yesterday. My babes went to public school. My two girls for the first time ever and my boy went to middle school after being out of the public system for FOUR years. I even have pictures to prove it, aah to prove that I really did get them up and going and actually dropped them off to be taught by strangers. The first day of school pictures are on the camera card and darn it the card reader is sitting in Portland. I'll have to post those pictures later but trust me it really did happen.

It all went down as planned. Natalie informed that she did not want any displays of affection in public and no pictures taken at the school. I compromised and took pictures of the kiddos in front of the house. On the way to school I had a nice talk about how the kids can and should tell me ANYTHING about what happens in their day. Good or bad, Mom wants to hear it all. At that point Natalie told me that I was scaring her and could I handle letting them go. Is it that obvious?

I got a nice kiss and hug from Jlyn and moved aside to let the other two start their day so that no one would be embarrassed. Then I went home and it was glorious and when I picked them up it was glorious. They liked it! Jlyn said that it would be even better if they would just let her take her shoes off during class. Natalie said that it would be even better if they had less rules and Cade just asked for money for the school store.

They are growing up but I do have my limits. Jlyn insisted that she could walk home all by herself so I let her. I just followed her in the van, maybe twenty feet back, slowly moving and making sure she looked both ways before she crossed a street. I had my niece Sierra in the car too and laughingly she said, "Geeze Aunt Sarah! You are like the stalker Mom." Is it that obvious? Have they not read that creepy yet lovely book "Love You Forever"and not know that they will always be my babies?

Thank You, Thank You, Thank You

2009-08-28T07:41:00.000-07:00

In the book Traveling Mercies, the author Anne Lamott says she has two prayers. One is "Help me, help me, help me." The other is "Thank you, thank you, thank you."

After reading this book about Anne Lamott's life, I appreciate the stripped away, bare bones openness of Anne and her prayers. These past summer months have been tough in the faith and hope department of my relationship with God because of what is next in our journey as a family.

I have noticed that the problem of Craig finding a job really is not the problem at all. For me it has been the emotions I have placed in each job posting that has come across our computer screen and thinking to myself could this job be the solution to our problem. The time and energy spent wondering if I could live here or there and the disappointment of not even getting an interview has worn me down to the point that I am willing to giving up and say I am done, help me. Help me not just with the job situation but for where my heart wants to go.

I guess it is giving up control and realizing that I am not in charge and then help comes and with it the overwhelming need to say thank you, thank you, thank you.

The big news is that Craig was hired to do Hospice care with the chaplaincy group in our home town. We get to go home! The other big news is that all the kids are going to give public school a try. I think it is the comfort of going back to Washington State that makes it easier for Cade. The first day of school is next Tuesday. The kids and I will go on Monday to get everyone registered and be there for the big first day.

After I drop the kiddos off at school I'll go back to my sister's house and lay on the couch, eat bonbons, paint my toenails, and watch a few soaps because I heard that is what all stay-at-home moms do and in my nine years of being at home I have yet to give it a try. Looking for a place to live might be on the list too.

Dog Days of Summer

2009-08-24T08:04:00.000-07:00

The sickness cycle has circled through and it appears we (most of us were sick) are on the mend. Much has gone on in the last ten days. Football has geared up for Cade. Natalie and Jlyn started soccer practice two times per week. Swim lessons came to an end and my two younger children have decided to give public school a try. Boo hoo hoo! How could they want to leave my comfy nest for a few hours a day?
Moving on, we literally experienced a few dog days of summer when our friends went to Hawaii and left their amazing Hawaiian wienie dog, Kaipo, with us for a few days. Our hearts were melting while he was here and the pangs of dog ownership increased. The force is strong with this one.
He uses his doggy ways to control you and make you do what he wants. Kaipo means sweetheart or lover in Hawaiian and he is all that. Just look at those little legs and his slinky smooth fur. He had the kids on his leash, serving him and loving him. Kaipo affirmed in my heart that I really want a small lap dog.
Kaipo's mind tricks only work on those in our family who are weak and hopelessly wanting a dog. I guess the force is strong with Craig too. He was not swooned by the dog charm. It could be that Kaipo has tried more than mind tricks on Craig and has turned to the dark side and tried hugging Craig's leg. I'll just say it straight out. That kind of dominance is not helping the kids and my campaigning for a dog of our own.

Stuffed Up

2009-08-15T07:45:00.000-07:00

Okay, I have not been my perky self this week. Usually I am up and ready for adventure. Hey, I would even consider myself an explorer for goodness sake but a week ago I was stricken with a summer sickness. I feel like Dora in this picture, stuffed up and dragged along when I should be walking on my two feet.

The kids have been so kind to me . You know nice love pats and sweet words wishing me better so I can hopefully take them somewhere fun (perhaps the AMUSEMENT PARK they cried out) before summer ends. All I could manage was to get them to swim lessons where I sprawled out on the spectator bleachers as if I had been on an all night bender. What else could I do? Who am I fooling, NyQuil is really not my friend. Sure I get a great nights sleep but the all day stupor can't be good for a mom with kids.

Yesterday when I turned down dessert, for those of you who know me well and know that I like to eat dessert first, I finally had to admit to myself that maybe I really am sick. Now I'll be a big baby. Ahhh I am sick. Prayer that is what I am finally resorting to. Maybe I should have started there or maybe it was just getting to the point of confessing that I don't feel good but yes prayer is needed for me to feel better and of course for that poor yummy dessert that I turned down. Forgive me dessert for letting you go come back to me someday!

Gone Fishin

2009-08-12T06:45:00.001-07:00

I like it when we find a hidden wonderful place on our adventures. For me it is like finding a jewel on a treasure hunt. So it was last week when we went to Horning's Hideout just outside of Portland. I think this place is family owned and operated and the nicest thing about it is that you just show up. For three dollars your child gets a pole with hook, line and sinker, fishing bait, a tool to remove the hook and a line to keep the caught fish on. The two large ponds are stocked with trout and then it is ready-set-go-FISH.
Tracey went with me and together we had eight kids. So while she manned the kids and poles I took a ton of pictures. We are close friends like that where I feel no guilt while she does all the work.
I think it was the first time some of the kids had seen a night crawler pulled apart and put on a hook. There was screaming and drama but eventually the kids got used to it. Except when it was time to eat lunch and they had worm guts on their hands. They are truly kids of the 2000's because they were dousing themselves with hand sanitizer.

I think they really liked this fishing thing.

Three fish and two crawdads were the catch of the day. I would have taken a picture of the crawdads but they were fast and got away. Still fun to see on the end of the hook. The woman at Horning's will clean your fish for you but since I have fishing skills I showed the kids how to gut and clean a fish. I thought pulling apart a worm was drama filled. The fish cleaning brought things to a new level and I am kind of concerned at how soft these kids are. It was a good lesson for them to see that something alive had its life ended to become food for them.
The fun ending to a day at Horning's Hideout is the paddle boat ride around the lake. Eight dollars got us two boats for half an hour. The kids might say the peacocks that roam the property and all the feathers they leave behind might be the best. You will just have to check it out if you come to Portland.

Something Beautiful

2009-08-10T08:02:00.000-07:00

A week ago something beautiful happened in our lives. This guy, my Mr. T, completed one more major milestone on the way to becoming a certified chaplain. It's kind of a funny word and the process each denomination uses seems to be a little different but we can now say the Craig is ordained.

You can read Craig's post on his blog for his thoughts. My thoughts, I was glad to have gone back to our home church in Washington State to walk through this process. It was at times a little ambiguous, stressful, hopeful, unknown and in the end it was grace filled. It was one of those beautiful moments in Mr. T's life that I got to be a part of, when I could tell what was in my husband's heart because it poured out through his eyes. I've seen it a few times before, on our wedding day, at the birth of each of our children, at hard goodbyes and on this ordination day. I can only describe it as something beautiful.

About That Surprise

2009-08-05T08:06:00.000-07:00

What a bad thing for me to do, talk about a top secret surprise and then take a few weeks to post about it. My sewing machine was a humming as I modified some crazy clothing finds from Goodwill all for the sake of my sister Tanya's 40th birthday surprise party at the beach. The whole family planned and took part in a through the years lip sync, crazy dancing, fashion show in her honor.
Her adventure began with what was supposed to be an hour outing to the casino. I played my part and acted like a caged bird set free and turned that one hour into three. We went here and there and just when she was totally annoyed I got the call that the coast was clear. When we walked to the door of the beach house Tanya was greeted by her sixteen year old son, Mitch, in a polyester baby blue and white striped suit. He whisked her away to put on her pretty pink party dress, which I found at Goodwill too and changed just a little. She told me she was scared to go upstairs and that she was sweating profusely. I reassured her there would be no hazing just singing and dancing. The evening was hosted by our Barbra Streisand lookalike sister, Des. Babs and her back-up sister dancers helped begin the evening with "The Way We Were." Three 1969 go-go dancers did a fabulous Nancy Sinatra with "These Boots Were Made for Walking.""I've Got You Babe" with Sonny and Cher.
Axel Rose and Billy Idol reminded us all of those good times from the 80's with "Rebel Yell" and "Welcome to the Jungle." A really good 90's "Rhythm Nation" by a cute Janet Jackson.
And a very funny "Vogue" by Madonna and her back up dancer rounded out the night.
Then things got out of control with "Thriller" and we had to shut this party down.

Passing Away

2009-07-31T10:30:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite pictures from the beach.
By morning the footprints were gone and the water farther away.
One of my favorite poets.
I will attempt to speak in words like hers.

Passing away, saith the Summer passing away:
Your twentieth high school class reunion on Saturday:
A big step in Craig's chaplaincy journey not far away.
Enjoy thou and play.
Then I answer'd :Yea
Passing away, saith the World by Christina Rossetti

Passing away, saith the World, passing away:
Chances, beauty and youth, sapp'd day by day:
Thy life never continueth in one stay.
Is the eye waxen dim, is the dark hair changing to grey
That hath won neither laurel nor bay?
I shall clothe myself in Spring and bud in May:
Thou, root-stricken, shalt not rebuild thy decay
On my bosom for aye.
Then I answer'd: Yea.

Passing away, saith my Soul, passing away:
With its burden of fear and hope, of labour and play,
Hearken what the past doth witness and say:
Rust in thy gold, a moth is in thine array,
A canker is in thy bud, thy leaf must decay.
At midnight, at cockcrow, at morning, one certain day
Lo, the Bridegroom shall come and shall not delay:
Watch thou and pray.
Then I answer'd: Yea.

Passing away, saith my God, passing away:
Winter passeth after the long delay:
New grapes on the vine, new figs on the tender spray,
Turtle calleth turtle in Heaven's May.
Though I tarry, wait for Me, trust Me, watch and pray.
Arise, come away, night is past and lo it is day,
My love, My sister, My spouse, thou shalt hear Me say.
Then I answer'd: Yea.

The Bacon Doughnut Break

2009-07-30T07:57:00.000-07:00

We interrupt this Oregon Coast blog postings broadcast to bring you this important message. Bacon on a maple bar does taste good. Voodoo Doughnuts continues to deliver.

If you are not daring enough to try the bacon maple bar I suggest the voodoo doll doughnut. It is a cute raspberry filled doll shaped doughnut that looks like it is bleeding when you bite into it, sadistic but good.

Nature Waits for No One

2009-07-28T07:23:00.000-07:00

Some of my fondest childhood nature memories involve my father's sister, Aunt Betty. Camping with Aunt Betty's family usually involved remote mountain tops that required backpacking into or island camping that employed a boat driver and a drop off for a week of stranded living.

Most mornings we would wake to find Aunt Betty doing a nude bath swim in the lake. Her ta-tas poking up out of the water like two buoys, a bar of soap resting on her belly and her white arms stretching far behind her. She would backstroke over to us and shout out, "Come on girls. Get in. It is reeeeFRESHING!" She was one with nature, naked, free and I learned from her that nature does not wait for you. It is happening and you need to be willing to get out there and enjoy it. "Rise and shine, nature is happening out there, it is not waiting for you." I said in a sweet quiet voice as I woke everyone up on Wednesday morning. Low tide occured at 7:00 a.m. rather than 3:30 a.m. and this was my Aunt Betty non-naked moment to get everyone out there to see what lies beneath those ocean waves. Hot chocolate bribery worked its wonder and amazingly the entire clan was headed down the foggy beach.
Mitch was the oldest of the kids and he made me laugh when he tiredly asked if I was high on CRACK for getting up this early.
The three tweenie weenie boys might have complained the most but I just blamed that on hormones and puberty. Here is their scowling ring leader Nathaniel.
This is what I am talking about. Nature at its finest, a purple starfish. Have you ever seen a purple starfish?
A true hindsight amongst the rocks and sea urchins. Look! Kelp growing out of the sand.
I liked that we could walk on these big rocks that only peak out of the waves when the tide is high.

The vibrant colors of starfish and the sucking sounds of the mussels closing up and digging in as they waited for the tide to come back was wonderful and beautiful.
Kind of like these creatures out in nature all of them wonderful and beautiful.

Thanks to Mr. T for more amazing beach pictures.

Women of the Oregon Coast

2009-07-27T07:44:00.000-07:00

Women of the Oregon Coast at the North Lincoln County Historical Museum. Where history comes alive.

Our trip out West was met with many obstacles and once we arrived at this rugged Oregon Coast we were prepared for anything. Unlike the warm waters of the Atlantic Ocean the Pacific waters bite at your toes and the fog here well let's just say it is fearless and thick.

My name is Madame Natalie and I tend the oil at the Yaquina Lighthouse. Upon my arrival I suggested that the cape be renamed Cape Foulweather simply because my mood was just like the weather FOUL.
My name is Miss Jadyn and I miss my island beaches. Every now and then beautiful glass globes wash ashore from fishing nets all the way from Japan and remind me that somewhere in the Pacific Ocean is my home. I pluck the strings of this harp to pass the time away.

Everyone here in Lincoln City knows me as Mrs. J. My husband lost his leg in a logging accident and now I take care of the whole family. There are so many blasted trees here and with the ruff terrain and jagged cliffs I am lucky my husband lost only his leg and not his life. Why just the other day we traversed down to the beach to a strange cove and when the tide came in we nearly got out of there by the skin of our teeth. I have decided to name that place Devil's Punchbowl as a warning to those who should decide to visit here.

Most folk here call me Miss Maya the kind lady who owns the Green Onion Bath House. The damp weather here leaves a stink on most people that only hot water and a good bar of soap can take away. Baths at the Green Onion only cost 5 cents and on most days people are lined out the door. I am sweet like that, always caring for the good of the people.

Everyone should know that on the Oregon Coast when the sun comes out...

so do the smiles.

Mr. T manned the camera this trip so all the wonderful pictures are his creative works of art.

Bella Beach

2009-07-18T09:34:00.000-07:00

Today we are going to one of my favorite places. We are going there for one whole week. I like to call it the Pottery Barn of the Beach and the last time we were there we looked like this.The kids behaved like this. Guess what. They still do.
The last time we were at Bella Beach my mom was with us. This was the last picture of all of us girls together and I am stuck as the ugly sister in the picture. No, that is not a wig on my head it is just what happens when my hair and the Pacific Ocean air interact.

I am looking forward to cherishing our beaches visits past and making new memories with family this year. Trust me as I write this, I will also be looking for better photo ops so I am NOT the ugly sister this time.

Tested and Top Secret

2009-07-17T07:41:00.000-07:00

Ay! This week has slipped away without me posting one darn thing. I had plenty to write about but such little precious time and energy. This week held the day of reckoning to see if two of my sweet homeschoolers could pass a standardized test.

Our homeschooling adventures began when we moved to that lovely Garden State, New Jersey. Let me say a few things about New Jersey homeschooling. First, there are NO requirements, nada, none. The State trusts that the parent who willfully takes a child out of their blue ribbon school system is smart enough to provide their child with a proper education and thus they want zero responsibility for the said child. Second, it is a great place to teach and go see and experience history, art, science, and music. That said, I loved our homeschooling experience in New Jersey.

Oregon welcomed us a year ago and while they have an amazing homeschooling community the State does require all children to test in third and fifth grades, homeschoolers included. That said, the test has been looming over the children all year. Not that I wanted it to be looming it just was. The test instructions told me to be positive about the test which I was but somewhere in my kids' minds they hold a New Jersey get out of testing for free card. This week they wanted to use it and use it bad. "Why can't we just move back to New Jersey?" I heard them say more than once.

Well, they took the test on Wednesday and wouldn't you know it. The test wasn't as bad as they thought and both of them scored a 96 out of 99 on the overall test. Three cheers for Cade and Natalie. I am simply amazed and proud of those two kiddos of mine. They too are happy and relieved that it is over.

Now the rest of my week has been classified as TOP SECRET but here is a little preview. It has involved feathers, Velcro, Stitch Witchery, and heaven forbid my sewing machine. I am hoping that next week I'll have some fun photos to share.

What If

2009-07-12T12:21:00.000-07:00

I laughed this morning as I watched this video. It reminds me of myself and the What If game I've been playing this week. My heart and mind became really squirrely as the first half of July came and went and we still don't have one tiny smidgen of an idea of what is next for us.

I liken myself to the squirrel and how innocently he entered into the yogurt container. What's wrong with playing all the scenarios of what could happen out in my head? At the beginning it felt right to think of all the options but pretty soon I found my heart wandering this way and that. My mouth opened and I said things that sounded pretty stupid. Overall, I just felt stuck in the What Ifs of it all.

After flopping around for a while, I prayed and wouldn't you know it I was free.The container per se was off my head and I was back to seeing the reality of the situation and a peace in my soul for living just for today. No, I don't have what I want - a job for Craig and a house for next year but I have something better - God's peace to keep my heart and mind from going into the garbage of What If.

Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. If you do this, you will experience God's peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

B. Lovely

2009-07-10T08:46:00.001-07:00

From my last post one might assume that I am a wine connoisseur and that would simply be a sham. For one thing I am way to cheap to buy wine so I only drink it when it is offered at dinner parties, weddings, and yes, sometimes the free sample at the Olive Garden. The second thing is that most of the time it tastes like I am drinking a glass of perfume which is not that pleasant.

On our excursion to Walla Walla I found that most of the time wine tasting is free which allowed this cheapskate to give it a try and brace yourselves I also found the most adorable wine bottle that quite possibly ever was. So cute and clever I almost hugged it and to be honest I was not the only girl in the shop oohing over this wine. It was a sweet almost syrupy Late Harvest Riesling labeled B. Lovely.
I loved the words on the back label.

B Sincere. B Generous. B Gracious. B Lovely.
We can't be lovely all of the time, but our wine certainly should be. Refreshing and clean with a hint of sweetness.

To top it off there was even a little bee on the top of the bottle. How cute is that? No worries though. I shan't binge on B. Lovely but just savor it for its keen marketing and packaging effervescence.

A Changing Landscape

2009-07-07T08:54:00.000-07:00

When I go home to Washington State it is not hard to notice that a change is sweeping the landscape. Over the past twenty years vines have been strategically weaving their way into the rural scenery. The warm soil that supports these vines produces a beautiful fruit that beckons wine makers to come to an unexpected part of this country of ours. They are coming and coming to stay. I am writing about the red section of the map above where sagebrush and locals are making room for picturesque wineries of every stature.

I guess I did not realize how far reaching the wine industry was until my sister, Selina and I took a drive to Walla Walla. This unique town nestled in the rolling hills of wheat that almost touch the Blue Mountains is most famous for their sweet onions. More importantly it was my home during my first two years of college. It is a funky town and I really wanted to visit it again. I was planning on antiquing but what we founds was an abundance of wineries and wine tasting shops.
Summer weekdays in Walla Walla are quiet and some shops and restaurants were closed. We had time on our hands to casually browse the open shops and enjoy some New York style pizza that reminded me of our East Coast adventure. The people here are fetching and friendly.

We checked out Waterbrook's new wine tasting room that is right off of highway 12 on our way home.Relaxing is how I would describe this place. I just sat down on a leather couch and breathed deeply and paged through the amazing books that lay about. It seemed like there was a Pottery Barn explosion here and it perfectly matched the surrounding scenery. The chatter from the owner and architect of this building was engaging and pleasant.
If you go through Lowden to get to Walla Walla stop here at the old school house which in French is pronounced L'Ecole and is named in honor of the French-Canadian trappers and traders that made their way to this part of the country in the mid-1800's. The school was used up until the 1970's and is beautifully preserved.
I loved the history of this place and the wine pourer gave us a eloquent briefing of the school's history and the L'Ecole No. 41 wines. The chalk board bar top was OH! SO! clever. If you have time to spare I would recommend a weekend visit to Walla Walla, Washington.

4th of July Pictures

2009-07-06T08:32:00.000-07:00

We had a grand ole time on the 4th of July. My sister and kids, the crazy Ngai family and a really sweet out of state family that Craig knows from the hospital joined us for...

A water balloon fight with a cute little Debbie.

That turned into a major battle.

Then moved into an all out water war.

A bubble gum blowing contest required lots of chewing and chewing.

Blowing and blowing.
Concentration and skill
and a biggest bubble blowing contest winner.
A no hands find the jelly bean hidden under the pile of whipped cream had the kids excited and concerned.
Once they got started they liked it.
This is Tim the dad of the family that joined us. I think he likes contests and competition because he really got into the water balloon fight and then this. It was fun and as much as we liked hanging with them we are happy that they get to fly home today. A really nice family.

In the end it was a favorite by all those crazy cousins.
And looking back at Colin holding Maya with her lactose shine and smiling face after the whipped cream was wiped away it is a reminder of a fun filled bright 4th of July.

From the Inside Out

2009-07-05T07:29:00.001-07:00

I noticed yesterday at our fourth of July celebration that time is going to fast. The kids are growing and changing and as parents we are too. It seems like the sands in our summer hour glass are slipping away and while it has been over-the-top kind of fun it is still fleeting. I've been praying, listening and worshiping God this morning. Am I really bold enough to admit that on my blog? None the less this song is a reminder that life is like a whisper and the One God I love is simply everlasting. Wishing you all a restful and sappy Sunday.

Independence Declared

2009-07-04T07:01:00.000-07:00

When, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bonds which have connected them with another...

I like to read the opening line of the Declaration in a low voice and imagine the importance of what these representatives of the people where saying to the person ruling over them. It is a document worth reading because in these words one can find the logic of Thomas Jefferson at work. He makes a brilliant case for the unfair treatment of the thirteen colonies. Details how they cannot standing being treated this way and why they need to break away from Great Britain and be free to govern themselves.

To read these words it would be easy to think that they came about in one long hot summer in Philadelphia but looking back they simply did not. They were almost thirty years in the making beginning with The Spirit of Laws in 1748, through many oppressive Acts, repeals of Acts, massacres, a famous midnight ride, tea parties and the development of a congress. Tumultuous times for certain.

... And for the support of this declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes and our sacred honor.

I noticed one day, as I passed by our copy of the Declaration pictured above, that Cade signed his name at the bottom and I also noticed the last line and wondered how many Americans know that in this Declaration the signers pledged their lives, fortunes and honor to each other. Hmmm, that is some sacrificial giving at work. Happy Independence Day!

The Brady Bunch

2009-07-03T08:15:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I left the desert part of Washington State with my three yahoos and three of their cousins. All together I had a real Brady Bunch, three boys and three girls. My hubby would of course ask the blaring question of "Are you crazy?" when I got home.
In my mind it seemed so simple, a straight shot to Portland with maybe one potty break along the way, all kids with electronic entertainment devices and me just driving and thinking about life. My dream drive was snapped back to reality when I saw the ROAD CLOSED sign and smoke ahead. Then we came to a complete stop along with everyone else.

All the people in front of us.
All the people behind us in the blazing 95 degree heat. Look at these pictures! This is the desert and the whole place looks like it could burst into flames at any minute and when the car stopped everyone decided they had to go to the bathroom. The fear of rattlesnakes was a nice deterrent from the kiddos tramping through the weeds to relieve themselves. I took the opportunity to remind them that snakes flee from fire so they were probably all headed this way.
All I can say is thank the Lord for the two loaves of pound cake that Uncle Larry threw in as we pulled out of the driveway. We might have perished out there. Traffic began to roll again and this was the culprit for our delay, a burning bush.
And in my mind I knew there was only thirty more miles to the nearest Starbucks and as my Dad would say, a bracer for the rest of the journey.

Going Up

2009-07-02T07:40:00.000-07:00

Our street car destination took us to a place the kids have been eying since we arrived in Portland.
Our ride on the this little silver bullet did not disappoint. We quickly went up, up, up.

The best part of the tram ride occurs at the midpoint when the tram car does a little bounce. At least I thought it was fun because the kids had such surprised and scared faces and there were a few gasps from others in the car.
The birds eye views were amazing.

Portland was a little hazy but we could still see Mount. Hood and Mount Saint Helens. Wouldn't you know it the pictures I took of Saint Helens did not turn out. You will just have to trust me that it still is an amazing sight to see with its top blown off and a little sad that I can remember what it looked like prior to the May 18, 1980 eruption. Looking back I really did think it was the end of the world when we came out of Sunday church services and the sky was turning dark.

What goes up must come down and down and down.

A Street Car Named...

2009-07-01T08:47:00.000-07:00

We are having fun testing out the modes of transportation around Portland. Ah! The street cars were fun to take pictures of because they are new and colorful. The inside of the streetcars remind me of the Riverline train that runs from Trenton to Camden in New Jersey. The ride feels the same but the scenery is very different.
I still am not sure if we were riding the Street Car legally because it was not clear when and where you pay. They also have a riding free zone called the "Fairless Square." Try saying that three times in a row. The woman sitting next to me assured me that we were riding inside the fairless square and our stop was just one stop outside the square. Still I stood in front of the ticket machine inside the car trying to figure out how to pay if I needed to.
The ride would have been absolutely wonderful if I had not stepped in a fresh pile of dog poo while walking through the park. Grrr! The kids thought it was quite humorous but after years of growing up on a farm and having every form of poo, from cow to geese, on my shoes I was not pleased. So the majority of our ride I had major waves of OCD thinking about how to get rid of the icky shoe poo.

Just Peachy

2009-06-29T07:18:00.001-07:00

This is the last jar of summer goodness and now it is gone. In the same amount of time it takes to grow and birth a baby our family has been enjoying this wonderful gift from my mother-in-law, Lois. Deep in my heart I am thankful for the whole box of canned peaches she gave us because canning fruit is hard work.

I know because I attempted to can peaches ONCE. In the process of peeling, pitting, slicing, dumping the slippery fruit in the jars, sealing and boiling one thought crossed my mind, "If I am doing this wrong I could make my family sick or worse they will die from my preserved fruit." This fear is valid because I remember a portion of my childhood where my Mother was a canning queen. Everything from fruit to very green sweet pickles and odd types of veggies were all put into clear glass jars for the next years consumption.

It happened one evening as I passed through the kitchen as my mom cooked dinner that I grabbed a green bean from a freshly opened home canned jar and popped it into my mouth. I was making the second chew on the bean when my sister Tanya questioned me, "Are you eating a green bean? Those need to be cooked! Do you want to DIE?" I certainly did not believe her and then my mom spun around and said, "Spit that out! Do you want to DIE?" Shocked by their overreaction and the slightest hint that canned food could contain a paralysis and possible death causing bacterium I not only spit out that bean but emptied the whole contents of my stomach into the kitchen sink. The only thing left was a deep fear of canned food.

I am happy to say that after one year of eating a box of home canned fruit we are doing just peachy. We live! Thank you Lois for the peaches.

The Sweet Stink of Puberty

2009-06-28T07:15:00.000-07:00

This activity has kept me and the girls on the go this week. Early morning delivery and then pick-up of two young men to Portland State University football camp all seems like a blur but one thing still lingers...the smell. Noticed how I used the term young men and not boys. Over the past year a change has begun that this mom, who grew up in a house full of girls, was not prepared for. It is the stink of growing up that no amount of deodorant can cover up and the amazing thing is that the boys love it. It is their rite of passage and the worse they smell the bigger the smiles on their faces.

I am not sure I'll ever understand boys. Take for example this hitting drill. The whole lot of them seemed thrilled. The boys trying to make it through and the BIG boys hitting them.
And at the end of the day they would all huddle together for some sort of encouragement and words of wisdom from their leader, the coach. From the sidelines all I could think was WHOA it has to be toxic in the middle of that pile and then my attention would be drawn back to the three girls turning cartwheels all around me and even now I can hear them repeating this week's favorite movie line from the Horton Hears a Who. "In Katie's world everyones a pony and they all eat rainbows and poop butterflies." Thinking to myself I realize that boys and girls are not that far off. It might just be that their response to life is sometimes different.

Oregon City Adventure Part IV

2009-06-26T07:17:00.001-07:00

Seriously, I am almost done posting about our Oregon City adventure. While the boys were away at summer camp the girls and I went back to ride the brand spanking new free trolley.
The seats were shiny and slick and I had a hard time not sliding onto the floor when we rounded corners.
I've noticed that painted murals are a big thing in most small towns in Oregon. Oregon City had a nice collection of art work displayed on the sides of buildings through out the town. I liked their main street banners with this years motto - "Appreciate the Past, Celebrate the Present"
The McLoughlin House was just one of the many old houses preserved and marked. This house is managed by the National Park Services and has an oral presenter who takes you through the old house.
I took a picture of our guide by the graves of Mr. and Mrs. McLoughlin. The house was moved to this spot because of flooding and the McLoughlins have been exhumed twice. I hope they stay at this current location. The guide was a little long winded and before we even made it into the house Jlyn was lying on the ground tossing grass into the air and letting it fall on her face. Seven year old bored antics did not hurry this guy along. He knew his stuff and wanted to share.
While Oregon City is a beautiful pioneer town, the industrialization and utilization of the magnificent Willamette Falls can not escape the eye of the visitor.

Big Ball Alliums

2009-06-24T08:57:00.000-07:00

Technology amazes me. Google amazes me. Yesterday I snapped a few photos of these flowers while we were at Portland State University. Not knowing the name of these beauties I searched Google for big purple ball shaped flower and voila there I had it, Alliums. Nature is really cool when you think about it, sometimes unusual and almost imaginary. These big balls remind me of something you would find on the pages of a Dr. Suess book.

Reminiscing, I remember my Grandma had just one gigantic purple Allium that grew on the side of her old farm house. It grew taller than all of us kids and we would run up to it and admire the large puff of purple.

One summer Grandma cut the bloom and put it in a big vase on the kitchen table. I can still see it sitting there in all of its glory and with me up on the table right beside it. I can even remember that enormous desire in my heart to reach out with both of my five year old hands and smoosh that purple powder puff. It is almost like it was yesterday. Oh yes, because it was yesterday and that desire to smoosh and crush was still there. What is it about that flower? It is just taunting me with its unique beauty to come and lay my hands on it.

On Foot - Chinese American Culture

2009-06-23T09:10:00.000-07:00

We have been afoot to discover the ethnic heritages that make up this interesting city of Portland. With the help of Travel Portland's self guided walking tours we made our way to Chinatown to explore the history and influences of Chinese American culture.
Dragons, mythical creatures and the female and male lions representing the yin and yang guard Chinatown. We stood there a long time looking at the gate and I wondered in my head how many times in my life I used the term yin and yang and never knew that it meant the interconnection of opposing forces. Culture is good.
The Chinese Garden is nestled between large office buildings and was the highlight of Chinatown. It is a peaceful setting amongst the rushing and bustling of commerce.

We took our shoes off as we toured the garden and received the most amazing foot massage from the variety of stone patterns that guide you on your way.

The girls loved looking at the Koi ponds and pointing out orange and white fish that darted about...

while these orange and white carts darted about the streets with delicious treats. The Dim Sum we ate at a local restaurant was great and the shops were very clean and full of treasures to be had. We were greeted on the street by a man in a green shirt, one of the many tourists information guides that hit the pavement to help make a visit to Portland amazing.

Oregon City Adventure Part III

2009-06-22T09:08:00.000-07:00

The Oregon City gig was like a gift that keeps on giving and there were so many great pictures to be had. The hands on exhibit about the migration of Americans to the Oregon Territory was the kids' favorite.
Oregon City really boomed after the completion of the Barlow Road. The new road allowed pioneers to travel around Mount Hood instead of turning the old covered wagon into a raft and floating it down the Columbia River to Fort Vancouver. I could not imagine making that decision. Let's see.... raging river and the possibility of drowning or treacherous volcanic mountain passes with massive rain and snow. Hmmm...what to do, what to do.
A personal highlight for me was the movie we saw called Bound for Oregon where the diary entries of four people were acted out. I was stunned when a pioneer woman named Elizabeth Dixon Smith told the story of how a married couple slowed the wagon train down because the wife would not get back in the wagon and go any further. Being obstinate did not pay well for the wife as the wagon train pulled away leaving her behind. Full of fury and vengeance the woman back tracked out of sight and overtook one of her husband's wagons and set it on FIRE!!! After putting out the fire the husband mustered enough strength to give the wife a good flogging.
Then it came. The woman's name was Marcum. There documented in the movie and the book "Covered Wagon Women" our family name and true to form as to what I know about a certain part of our ancestral line. It has been told to me that the men of our family sometimes behaved like jackasses and the crazy women they married could get a little carried away. I've loved those stories about our family and never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would actually read about them in a book.

Charged

2009-06-21T07:45:00.000-07:00

We have seen Zap Cars, Smart Cars and plenty of hybrids but last week was the first time we saw an electric car recharging station. What else could I do but take a picture and say three cheers for new technology and greener living. I wonder if the boats across the street will ever run on electricity?